Sunnyskies Posted December 7, 2015 Report Share Posted December 7, 2015 Definitely dentists are not annual leave days and if they knew why you took leave you can ask for it to be changed. Another reason to contact Fairwork. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RYLC Posted December 7, 2015 Report Share Posted December 7, 2015 Woulda shoulda coulda!!! He's one of THOSE. All lies!!! He has never had any intention of paying you. This is just a carrot (and a poisoned carrot at that). He may as well tell you he has next week's lotto ticket for you. Do not look back at what might have been. He is painting a picture in hindsight to tempt you that he has never had any intention of seeing through. The bible says that those who look back will be turned to a pillar of salt. Leave him in the dust of the salt mine and do not look back!! He is acting illegally and once you are out and settled with PR you might choose to report him. For now keep that ace up your sleeve. From now on say as little as possible. Mara is right about the leave situation. Making you take annual leave instead of sick leave is wrong. I run payroll so I know for sure. How many more days do you have to work? Keep your sense of obligation in your pocket. He doesn't deserve any from you. If it's not long then seriously think about going to your GP and getting booked off for stress leave. Lots of people do this and it is considered grounds for sick leave. You just send the doctor's note into the employer and then never have to go back. Come on - do it for yourself and do it for all of us too who would love to see you stick it to him. I dare you! Just be done with him. Clients will survive. Think of this as your "bus" moment where he has to adapt to you not being around. You'll be doing him a "favour" in the long run.... 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rozellem Posted December 7, 2015 Report Share Posted December 7, 2015 I can hardly reply to this topic, I am so angry. If Surferman needs a wing"person" for his lynch mob, I whole heartedly nominate myself. Follow some of the advice above, email things so you have it on record, ask about paying back dated earnings, put a tape recorder on your desk and make a fuss of switching it on when he comes for one of his "chats" again. Get booked off for stress till you leave. And, most importantly, dont listen to a single one of his lies. You are almost there. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ottg Posted December 7, 2015 Report Share Posted December 7, 2015 Keep a diary of everything that was said plus the time and date. Print a copy of all emails as you never know when you are going to need that. Try to have someone present next time when he speaks to you and diary that! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mara Posted December 7, 2015 Report Share Posted December 7, 2015 If Surferman should need further back up, count me in! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chips Posted December 8, 2015 Report Share Posted December 8, 2015 Hold on Eyebrow all this will soon be a thing of the past, you are stronger than most of us here. Hope days will fly by and your notice will be over soon 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kanniewagnie Posted December 8, 2015 Report Share Posted December 8, 2015 Eyebrow, I agree that you should print his e-mails and keep record of his lies. If you did not need it in 2 year's time, you can burn them. Don't give him any more information - he is using everything you tell him against you by twisting it around. Be strong, it is the last few steps before the winning line that feels the hardest. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SML Posted December 8, 2015 Report Share Posted December 8, 2015 Oh my gosh! The sooner you can get out of there the better! He really is evil. I agree with everyone, print your e-mails and keep note of everything. Hope that the time left there flies by! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OubaasDik Posted December 8, 2015 Report Share Posted December 8, 2015 Wow, I have never heard of anyone quite as toxic and manipulative as this creature. Please contact Fairwork up front and ask them what you can do about this sort of thing. They may have many more ideas than we have and may even have a whisper into his shell-like ear. A friend had a girlfriend just like this - didn't want him, was always screwing around, but wouldn't leave him or allow him to leave her - threats of suicide, threats of violence (she had 3 brothers who were almost as psycho as she was). Terrible time for him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eyebrow Posted December 8, 2015 Author Report Share Posted December 8, 2015 He has been coming to see me everyday after all clients have left. Yesterday he brought a letter from one of the most prominent lawyers in Melbourne, stating that there is no benefit to me moving rurally and that they are 'appalled' that I would do that and 'that I had bad advice' and that 'she had expected better from someone with my education'. This was very difficult to see in black and white. And from someone so prominent. I have read so much. And talked to many different people and I thought that this is the best. The strain at my work has been too much this past year. I feel like a shell. I am also working in private sector now and new job is in the state sector. So the emphasis on performance bonusses is gone. I will earn a set salary with the security that that brings. And set hours. None of this 'after hours' if you want to prove your worth. But what if the lawyer is right? What if I am making a big mistake? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunnyskies Posted December 8, 2015 Report Share Posted December 8, 2015 That doesn't sound like legal advice but rather abuse of their position by making bland statements and potential bullying. It would be worth your while reporting the lawyer to the Victorian law society. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tazzn Posted December 8, 2015 Report Share Posted December 8, 2015 Honestly I think it's scare tactics. I am sure he says your worth in the business and would never admit that or pay you what you are worth to keep you! Instead he would much rather scare you into staying!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedPanda Posted December 8, 2015 Report Share Posted December 8, 2015 You know, really, if your boss was that concerned for you he'd have paid you what your work was worth right from the start. The sooner you talk to the Fair Work people, the better. Do it for the next person this guy is going to abuse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mara Posted December 8, 2015 Report Share Posted December 8, 2015 Eyebrow... let me paint a little scenario for you... all you need to do is give it some thought! Boss is so controlling, that he cannot believe that you, who should be his total minion on a 457, have the guts to stand up to him. After everything he has done and abused you with I would not be at all surprised if.... With modern technology, he has drafted his own lawyer's letter, on a letterhead that he made up, and either he signed or had someone else sign... give me ten minutes I can design and write a letter for you about anything, from anyone, to anyone, on the most beautiful letterhead you can think of! Did he give you a copy of the letter... I do not think so... if he did, call his bluff and call the lawyer... my guess is they would know nothing about it... unless of course it may be a family relation, who may even have an interest in the business... I would put absolutely nothing past this guy! My advice... take your life and run... on your bike girl, get going... Queensland here I am, for a happy life, happy husband, happy kids and a secure life! When it comes time for your PR application I am convinced that you will get a lot more support from a State employer than from a Private employer, with regard to the needs and concerns with your son. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RYLC Posted December 8, 2015 Report Share Posted December 8, 2015 2 hours ago, Eyebrow said: He has been coming to see me everyday after all clients have left. Yesterday he brought a letter from one of the most prominent lawyers in Melbourne, stating that there is no benefit to me moving rurally and that they are 'appalled' that I would do that and 'that I had bad advice' and that 'she had expected better from someone with my education'. This was very difficult to see in black and white. And from someone so prominent. I have read so much. And talked to many different people and I thought that this is the best. The strain at my work has been too much this past year. I feel like a shell. I am also working in private sector now and new job is in the state sector. So the emphasis on performance bonusses is gone. I will earn a set salary with the security that that brings. And set hours. None of this 'after hours' if you want to prove your worth. But what if the lawyer is right? What if I am making a big mistake? I agree with Mara: he has concocted this himself. One of my clients is an industrial relations lawyer so without mentioning specific details I have asked her about this scenario. This is her reply: Lawyers don't give opinions about people's personal decisions - they only advise on the law. Resigning is not against the law. No lawyer would put in writing phrases such as 'she had expected better from someone with my education' as that is slanderous and not a legal argument. We deal with the facts of the law only. ..."stating that there is no benefit to me moving rurally and that they are 'appalled' that I would do that" is also not a legal argument and no lawyer would put that in writing. This doesn't sound like a genuine letter to me. A "real" lawyer knows that they could be disbarred for unprofessional conduct for such a stupid letter and would NEVER risk their career like this. Who is this idiot??!! See Eyebrow? He is what is called a narcissist: controlling bully who thinks he can use the "law". BIG mistake when you have all of us to advise and give insight. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RYLC Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 Eyebrow I am on a lot of other forums and here is a bit of a run down of a similar situation where other Aussies were giving advice. I've taken out all names and other identifying info. You'll see when you read this that it is a normal Aussie response to take stress leave and be done with it. Don't let your over developed Saffa sense of obligation keep you chained to this situation. Need to quit job - workplace stress and bullying Hi everyone, I have called in sick to my permanent part time job today due to stress. Over the 21 months I have worked there, I have had my confidence eroded to a shred by the HR woman. I work fulltime and have 3 kids, one with autism. I also study part time at uni. I'm juggling a lot. But I work hard and my clients are happy with me. I am so stressed I don’t know what to do. I have cried all night and can't eat. My Mum is doing her nut telling me to get out of there, they should be sued for what they've put me through. My hubby said just quit. I'm on the verge of going into a dark padded room I think! The thing is I need to give two week's notice. I have annual and sick leave accrued. I just can't bring myself to go back into the office. How does this pan out from a legal point of view? I mean they can't send a van and physically force me to go to the office. I'm going to the doctors now to get a stress leave note. Has anyone out there been through this before? Any input would be greatly appreciated. ==================================================== Perhaps when you go to the drs get your note to cover the 2 weeks and when you get home draft a letter of notice. If you can't get a drs note for 2 weeks maybe use your sick leave. Best of luck & keep us posted xx ==================================================== Take leave...NOW.....what can they do ===================================================== You can just walk out of a job, it's called abandonment of employment. I'm not sure what they can do about it but I have a friend who did exactly that - walked out for a cigarette break and never set foot in the office again. Alternatively apply for your leave for the next two weeks and use that as yoru notice. Often if it's not amicable the employer is happy to get the employee out anyway. ==================================================== I have no real advice but just hugs. You are doing the right thing by going to the doctor. With a husband, children (one with special needs) and study, perhaps you are just too stressed. Having a stressful supervisor can't possibly be helping. ==================================================== Been there - done that. Get sick leave certificate, use up all your leave then resign. ==================================================== Google work place bullying and follow the links to your state. Then you may also end up on Worksafe vic as there are emergency numbers to ring on days like this for people in every state except Victoria! You ideally need to have kept a diary or records of the bullying thats taken place. If you want to you can make a report about this woman. You are entitled to let them know you are resigning and are taking stress leave effectively immediately. If you want to do that go to the Dr. today. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO GO BACK in there if you feel bullied or afraid. Get your stress leave or just sickness certificate and write your letter. Sounds like you have a lovely husband too! x ==================================================== Thanks so much. I ended up a crying blithering mess at the doctors and I keep crying intermittently. ==================================================== I read a quote the other day it goes...'Do it trembling if you must, but do it'. ==================================================== I just went through this not long ago. I went to my Dr who advised me for my health to quit. He gave me 2 weeks to think about it. I could not face going back so I sent them my resignation in writing and my dr gave me another med certificate to cover the time. I gave no reson for quitting just that I gave them 2 weeks notice as required by law. I worked my last two weeks out on sick leaveMy DP like yours said the same thing. Life is too short. Good luck. ==================================================== Hugs. I second taking stress leave. Years ago my boss told me I had to give 2 weeks notice so I went to my doctor, got a medical certificate, put that in and left. She was not happy but could not do a thing about it. ==================================================== You cannot buy your health and no amount of money is worth all that stress. You, your health and sanity, and your family come first. ==================================================== This morning I sent in my letter of resignation with the medical certificate from the doctor. As soon as I sent that letter I felt a big black cloud lift off my solders :-) ==================================================== Believe me even though you probably vunerable at this moment there is always something better around the corner.................I have definitely been there and done that. Get out of there NOW it is not worth your sanity ................with you skills you will easily get another job. Fully understand what you are going through MEGA big time. Great big ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 (edited) Eyebrow I also agree with both Mara and RYLC. I spoke to my husband who is a lawyer and he said the same thing as they did, this letter has been concocted by him. Lawyers in Australia are extremely careful on how they word anything because of liability issues. This is not a legal issue and therefore a lawyer has to be vested interest to give advice. Plus as others have said they would be very careful as to wording any letter incase you were to report him. In my opinion I would report this guy to fairwork. How do you know that this lawyer is prominent? Did he tell you that? As Mara said it would very easy to forge a letter and I wouldn't put anything past this pig. What he is doing to you is completely outrageous. I wish I could come to work with you lol. I am sure Mara and RYLC wish that too. Maybe imagine us there with you in your corner cheering you on. You are probably the only person who he has employed that has ever had the guts to leave.....that's why he is treating you this way. Bullies like to pray on the weak. Stay strong go to work with a smile and do not let him think that he is getting to you. That's what he wants. Hang in there you can do it. ? Edited December 9, 2015 by Guest l Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RYLC Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 Just now, emma.yenkanna said: I wish I could come to work with you lol. I am sure Mara and RYLC wish that too. Too right!! I would be calling in every afternoon to escort you home as he wouldn't have the balls to harass you with an audience. Can hubby or anybody be a pick up service for you for the short time left there so that you can leave promptly? 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 Also just read RYLC's post. Can you not just leave?? What can he do? I would also maybe diarise everything that has happened to you since you were in his employ.He has treats many other employees like this in the past You did the right thing getting out of there just imagine if you had stayed. Can you not contact fairwork and just get advice? Maybe they will tell you to just quit. Nothing wrong in getting advice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rozellem Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 LEAVE, you havd been too nice and South African about it. Nobpdy expects you to stand there and take it day in and out. Havd your husband come pick you up at work. Make an appointment with a Dr and get booked off for stress till you leave. It is in your rights to do so. Record everything, email the pig and ask for a copy of the fake letter for your records. Dont be alone with him at all. Start removing all your personal belongings now and ring Fair Work for some back up. Ps. You will have a MUCH better chance for making PR, if you work for the state and live rural than where you are now. At your current job you will only ever be a slave. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mel-B Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 I am stunned. How low will this guy go? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FairGo Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 Rubbish!! Absolute rubbish!!! I do not believe for a second that a lawyer will put something like that in writing. Eyebrow, listen to this song and next time your boss walks up to you, replay the chorus in your head!! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDc_5zpBj7s 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SurferMan Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 Eyebrow, if you have a copy of the letter, send it to the lawyers and ask them how they formed a legal position without your input....I bet he faked. Asswipe. Please let me moer this idiot. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinaB Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 What an A-hole!! At the very least try not to be the last one to leave the office - afterall you have no reason to work late anymore. Just leave when everyone else leaves. The quicker you can get out of the the better. No matter where you end up it;s got to be better than with that guy. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mara Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 Pretty please Eyebrow, it is such a long time since I was in a position where I could tell someone to go to hell, and have them look forward to the journey! Can I come to work with you and have a very friendly chat with your boss? Ag pleaze Eyebrow let me take you to the Qld , all six seven of us, eight nine ten... we are all behind you... over 380 posts, all telling you to go... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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