SML Posted June 21, 2015 Report Share Posted June 21, 2015 Good luck & enjoy the last week!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neels Posted June 28, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 28, 2015 Our last evening in South Africa.... I still can't believe that the time is actually now here.We are spending the last couple of days since Friday here with my in-laws in Delmas. I'm sitting alone at the dining table doing some catch-up on the forum after a hectic few days of packing, greeting, crying, some more packing and greeting... My wife is spending some quality time with her mother and sister (here from Bloemfontein), the kids are with Oupa, and everybody is leaving me by myself....and that is not all that bad. Actually it suits me fine.The last week at home was spent getting rid of the last few things that didn't make it into the container. We sold some, gave away a lot for charity and did some last minute shopping for warmer clothes to take with on the plane. I sold the last of our vehicles and transferred some funds into my Aussie bank account. We also spent a lot of time saying good bey to a lot of people. Sorting the last loose ends at my business and greeting our close friends and family.I made an effort during the last couple of weeks to spend some more time with my parents, who only live a couple of blocks from where we stayed. But saying good bey on Friday morning when we left was worse than I expected... My dad got very emotional. His health is failing and after the stroke he had last year and having his leg amputated he feels that he won't see us again. And that made me sad, knowing he might be right. I was tough, but had to be done.Sitting here, I know whats going to happen tomorrow morning and afternoon. My father in-law has also not been well lately and mother in-law has been playing the guild game. I arranged a friend of mine to take us to the airport. Prohibited my in-laws from greeting us there. But they went behind my back and together with my wife changed my plans so they can take us to the airport. Needless to say, I'm very pissed off about that. But...it is what it is. I don't want to be the enemy so I'll bite my lip...We are 4 people with 40 kg's of baggage allowance each. After packing all the check-in baggage earlier, we don't even get to 30 kg's each.. So now the worry is....are we taking enough?.. We'll see.I can't wait to get the last of the farewell's out of the way tomorrow... Then sitting back in the slow lounge relaxing and just taking in the atmosphere. Hopefully I'll be able to 'report' in before the flight, otherwise we'll see you again when we get to the other side.. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rozellem Posted June 29, 2015 Report Share Posted June 29, 2015 Good luck Neels. If I was you, I would probably pop out to the shops early tomorrow morning and fill my extra baggage space with toiletries and underwear or anything else small, but vistal for the months ahead. Or pack wine! Pecks anchovette! Or biscuits or other typical RSA goodies. Dont waste that space. Bon voyage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QACR Posted June 29, 2015 Report Share Posted June 29, 2015 Praying for you and your family. You are an inspiration to us all...thanks for sharing your story. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batsie Posted June 29, 2015 Report Share Posted June 29, 2015 All the best Neels. We are also leaving tomorrow and I can relate to your emotions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rozellem Posted June 29, 2015 Report Share Posted June 29, 2015 My sister and her two kids are on the 6pm Qantas flight to Sydney (Monday night), sadly only for a holiday. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SML Posted June 29, 2015 Report Share Posted June 29, 2015 Good luck!! We are leaving next week & can relate to the emotions! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neels Posted July 1, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 1, 2015 We have arrived! Wow, what a welcoming we had... My cousin and his wife met us at Melbourne Airport last night just after 6pm. They picked us up with his car and a trailer for all the suitcases. After a 50min drive when we arrived at their home we were surprised by about 5 other families. It was an awesome welcoming. Especially for my wife and kids to meet everybody. Our flight over with Qantas was pretty smooth and uneventful. And even with the limited space, we all managed a little sleep. The final few hours before our arrival in Sydney, our boy started feeling a bit ill. We put it down to a combination of nerves, tiredness and motion sickness. Even after we landed in Sydney, he wasn't feeling well. Fortunately he started feeling better after we landed in Melbourne and was soon back to his usual self between the new friends and family.We all had a good night's rest and even though the wife and kids are struggling a little on our first day, we are trying to stay awake. Today we will just be unpacking our bags and finding our feet around the house. We will be living with my cousin and his wife till our container arrives. Baby steps... 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mara Posted July 4, 2015 Report Share Posted July 4, 2015 Neels, I must have missed your post, just did a search now and found it!Great that you had a good trip and wonderful of your cousins to have arranged such a lovely welcoming party for you.Tazzn is trying to arrange a get together for the end of this month, if you could get in contact with her that would be wonderful!We all look forward to meeting you and your family in person, at last! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndreCarla Posted July 4, 2015 Report Share Posted July 4, 2015 Awesome news Neels! Thinking of you and the family and praying for a smooth transition with lots of blessings - big and small! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kanniewagnie Posted July 4, 2015 Report Share Posted July 4, 2015 Neels, take it slow and be kind to yourself. You've absorbed a lot of stress the past few weeks and be prepared that over the next few weeks, that stress will 'release' in unexpected ways. I'm glad you've made it this far and hope that the road ahead will be easier. We've arrived 1March and we still feel a little 'unstable' some days. I now just focus on day-to-day stuff and somehow feels disconnected from my old SA -self. Next goals: 1. For hubby to be happy and confident at work; 2. Homeownership & 3. Citizenship. To that we say: HOOR, HOOR! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neels Posted July 6, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 6, 2015 (edited) Thanks for all the good wishes etc. You are all a bunch of awesome people on here!!I Had my first day on the job today... It felt like I returned from vacation after a couple of weeks, and not that I was here 6 months ago. I was made to feel at home from the moment I walked into the door this morning. And when I left this afternoon, it was as if we have been working together for a while and not just one day.There is a lot of work... as if they started stockpiling my workload a couple of weeks ago already. But this, I can get used to. Edited July 6, 2015 by Neels 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mara Posted July 6, 2015 Report Share Posted July 6, 2015 That is wonderful news!Please go and check under events victoria... Tazzn has been trying to get hold of you to arrange the meet up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neels Posted July 12, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 12, 2015 12 days in... It is cold, wet, not a lot of sun, but still beats most days we had back is RSA. The wife and kids are settling in nicely. They have all recovered from various degrees of the flu and they are getting into a kind of daily routine. The school starts in the morning and both kids are a little nervous but also excited.. We spend the weekend getting their school uniform and stationary sorted. My first full week at work was good. Better than good actually. I was surprised at how smooth things are going, and was almost waiting for things to go wrong. But my new employers and the guys have been so good. Made me feel very welcome, and is very supportive. They even gave me the day off tomorrow to get the kids enrolled in school. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chips Posted July 12, 2015 Report Share Posted July 12, 2015 Good to know you are doing well at work,good luck with the kids tomorrow.please keep us updated of their 1st week at school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eyebrow Posted July 12, 2015 Report Share Posted July 12, 2015 Fantastic. Glad it is going so well!It is cold now. And hard to remember that it hit the 40's in January! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neels Posted July 28, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 28, 2015 One month here..... Wow! What a ride we had so far.Our container arrived on Friday last week and will undergo quarantine inspection on Wednesday. This is where we hope that they don't need to fumigate or quarantine anything.We secured a very nice rental, but can only move in on 21st of August. So apart from paying the Au$520 for the inspection we'll have to pay about the same amount for the extra storage until we can move in. But that is worth it, rather that than moving into a place we don't really like.The kids are doing very well in school and is quite happy. They both complaint about the lack of discipline in the classes etc, but are extremely happy with the small classes and school in general. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neels Posted October 1, 2015 Author Report Share Posted October 1, 2015 Three months in…Today it’s been 3 months since me and my family arrived in Melbourne. And to be totally honest, I’m sitting here with mixed emotions.Was it easy? NO!! Absolutely not.Is it getting better? Maybe…Is it all worth it? Yes… No… Maybe… I don’t know! Ask me again in a few months. I truly can’t say that I have an easy answer to that question. And my honest reply might not be what I (or anybody for that matter) want to hear.The idea of sitting here and putting my thoughts to paper, is not only to get it off my chest and to put it in perspective, but also to be totally honest with myself. And who knows, in the process maybe being of some help or assistance to anybody that might find the time to read through all of it all.Knowing what I know now, sitting here at this very moment, having all of the issues that we’re having. I think I will still do it again…. But…. But, there are a lot of but’s…. A whole heap of them. Most important – I won’t attempt it during a Melbourne winter. And as luck would have it, they say it’s the worst winter in many years. I had a slight idea what we were getting into, but my wife and kids really suffered.Not so much the fact that we couldn’t carry all our winter clothes we needed, we could buy those. It was just a kind of cold that we were (..are…) not used to. Wet, and cold and miserable and days without seeing the sun. It plays tricks on your mind, and no matter what anybody says, it makes you depressed even when you are not a person with depression. Go to work when it’s dark out, get to work when it’s dark out, leaving work when it’s dark out, and getting home when it’s dark out – get the idea?...It’s getting better now. The season is changing very quickly. Not summer yet, but getting there. Longer days, a lot more sun. Light earlier and dark later.Here is a ‘list’ of negative things about being here: (I am not complaining and I’m not mentioning this to put fuel on the fire for those who are always looking for something to go off about how bad it is or what what..)Schools – our kids (boy 8y/o gr 2 and daughter 14y/o in gr8) are in public school (we can’t afford to put them in private school, and we don’t want to, then we could have stayed in RSA) There is hardly any discipline, no Religion, no respect, all ages swear like sailors. That is a fact!Environment – even though it is 1000 times better than what we are used to in RSA, it is not clean, or at least not everywhere. People litter and most don’t clean up after themselves. And that is very evident in industrial areas and along some highways and freeways and some residential areas.Crime –There is more crime here than what people want to believe. But it is mostly petty crime, nothing too serious. Drugs and drug related crimes are becoming more obvious, and drugs is a huge issue here – BUT, the government and the police are actually doing something about it. Serious crime gets a lot of news coverage, so it looks worse than what we are used to.Unrooted – The worst of it, is not belonging. Even though I live here now, I earn a salary, pay my TAX, and all that goes along with that.. This is not HOME! My roots is not here! I miss my people, my parents, my work, my business, my house, my man-cave, my friends, the smell of a fire, the sound of the night. And it is much worse for my wife! For her this is hell. She really suffers. She puts up a front, but I am very worried.It’s late, I go to work again early in the morning, will try to continue this in a day or two…… Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mara Posted October 1, 2015 Report Share Posted October 1, 2015 Neels, I feel for you and your family, I hope the change to summer soon, will make you all feel better! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ottg Posted October 1, 2015 Report Share Posted October 1, 2015 @Neels - I know quite a few people who will share your view. Being initially from Lydenburg and going to Melbourne must have been a shock in all aspects and must have had a major impact on your entire family. To beat Lydenburg's (Sabie, Graskop) natural environment I believe you need to go to "paradise" (where ever that might be). Many years ago I spent quite some time at Mariepskop and I thought that was paradise.All I can suggest is try to get the family involved in your local community. It does get better over time - for some it takes a 1000 days to adapt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
qwerty Posted October 1, 2015 Report Share Posted October 1, 2015 I love living in Sydney! Since I arrived in May last year, I've really enjoyed living here. We initially thought we'd go to Melbourne, but after our visa activation trip in 2013 it fell right off the list (Sydney won hands down). I honestly think that if we ended up in Melbourne that I probably would have been miserable. Some people are just more affected by the weather than others.It is still early days; wait and see how it goes during summer and then maybe rethink your location (if you need to). Australia is a big place and you are bound to find a spot here that suits your family and your lifestyle best. Crossing fingers that it works out for you guys. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rozellem Posted October 2, 2015 Report Share Posted October 2, 2015 Neels, does your wife get out of the house ( in a meaningful way)? For women (and men, of course) if is very important to feel that you matter. That people will miss you if you did not pitch up. If she is not yet, she should find a part time job and get out there. Even if its voluntary only at this point. Happy wife, happy family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neels Posted October 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted October 4, 2015 Thanks for the response...Neels, does your wife get out of the house ( in a meaningful way)? For women (and men, of course) if is very important to feel that you matter. That people will miss you if you did not pitch up. If she is not yet, she should find a part time job and get out there. Even if its voluntary only at this point. Happy wife, happy family.Thanks for that rozellem, believe me I know the happy wife happy life part all too well.. But to answer your question: yes she does get out. She is a Pilates instructor and now teaches 3 classes a week at one of the local gyms. We are hoping that she will get some more classes added when the school reopens next week. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neels Posted October 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted October 4, 2015 To continue from where I left off...It's not that we have no friends, or nothing to do and no connections.. We had a very soft landing. When we first arrived we had a place to stay, we had a choice of vehicles, we had people showing us around. And when I started working, my wife and kids had someone around them almost 24/7. We have a number of South African friends here in the area, and have met quite a few Aussie mates. It is just that my wife and here parents and sister is very close. She was brought up in Lydenburg, and it was the only place she ever knew. Okay granted, we did travel a lot, and have been to Europe, Australia, USA and a few African countries. But we always went back home... This time, that home is here.I have mentioned a couple of negative things, but the positive outweighs them by FAR. This weekend was Grand Final weekend, but even though I worked most of Friday and Saturday morning, we just got home from camping and fishing at Waranga Basin. (And on top of that, daylight saving has also started today.) Last weekend we had a 4x4 trip with our local 4x4 Club at Cobaw State Forest, and just 2 weeks before that is was a day off-roading at Talarook State Forest. We have been to V8 Supercar Races, a KidzFest in Shepparton, St Kilda Beach, Skiing at Lake Mountain Resort etc etc.. There is a lot to see and do here. A whole lot more family time than we ever had together. But the underlying current is always going to pull (draw) us back to what we know, where out roots are. I just pray that as ottg says above, that we find our paradise here. And sooner rather than later. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedPanda Posted October 6, 2015 Report Share Posted October 6, 2015 I have heard (we have not moved yet, will be doing that next May) that the initial problem is that you cannot make 'old friends'. So you will feel out of place and a bit 'loose' until enough time has passed to have old memories with the friends you make in your new place. And then you will start to feel more attached to your home/local area. So maybe, just keep contact via Skype or similar with the family and friends you have back in RSA to help sustain you, and give things time. I'm sure it'll feel better when you can go on a 4x4 trip with buddies and say:"Woah, remember last year when we..."I've also read that the area you are in plays a role in the school experience. But obviously I don't know what your situation is. Perhaps air this issue in the "School Forum"? Maybe someone will have good advice.In the meantime, sterkte, sterkte, sterkte!!! And keep on sharing your experiences, so you don't feel isolated(humans are social animals). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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