Queensland Girl Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 I have been contemplating writing about our immigration for long time. It was such a deeply personal experience, but I feel the need to share .When you leave South Africa, one is on a real adrenalin high. With the fear comes the excitement and obviously all the aspects of tying up all the loose ends of a life.Your arrival in Ozz is much of the same. Busy, busy, oohs and aahs about what is so great, settle,shop, sight see etc etc.But then, when you have settled , one day you realise- okay, this is it. Here I was in a country that looked the same but was so different that it took my breath away. Suddenly I realised i did not "get" Ozzie humour. That no-one I knew could roll over laughing at Casper de Vries. That Leon Shuster movies my kids loved were not all funny to their Aussie friends. That Affies and Tukkies meant nothing to anyone, and I had lost my Radar to place people. I had been a very Political Animal In South Africa and had campaigned ferociously at every election. Now I did not understand the Australian Political Scene, and even if I did I couldent vote. WHERE DID i BELONG? Would I ever belong. How come my children are sounding like Ozzies? And whilst fighting this internal confusion we were setting up new Businesses, and every day eating away at our capital.To all Business applicants I say again, careful, careful, careful. Our first business venture was a complete failure. We were ill equipped and did not understand our customer AT ALL. We came with pre conceived South African ideas. WRONG! Luckily we saw the writing on the wall and got out quick. Our second venture was another miscalculated horror story. We lost more money, and our confidence was at a all time low. Would we ever be able to get back on our feet? Had we lost it? This was in our second year , our business life was in turmoil, we had eroded most of our capital, we missed the familiarity of South Africa.We missed our families and friends. I still didnt have Aussie friends I could laugh with. Lots of acquaintances. At the beginning of the second year we took stock. This is it, this is our bed. Secretly I wept and held introspection and I realised that by constantly looking back I was unable to move forward. . I must stop my incessant checking of South African news. I must stop my weeping over the past, I must stop spending all my energies on the ones I left behind. I must spend my energies on the people of my future.It was then that I realised that for me to really succeed in Australia I needed to stop straddling the Indian Ocean. One leg in Africa, One in Australia. I needed to put both feet here. And then, I changed my attitude. I looked at people, although different, as potential friends. I read Australian newspapers- REALLY read. I readabout Australian History, I watched every Australian made movie I could lay my hands on.I listened to Australian musicians and viewed Australian Art. I got involved in the school Cafeteria, I put myself out there- I let my defences down and made an effort. I spent less time on the internet with friendships and news in SA , and worked on friendships here. We worked on our businesses. We employed Australians who smoothed the way.Today, six years after leaving South Africa, I am a South African born Australian. I will be voting in the 24th of November and know and understand the political issues. I understand Kath and Kim and I enjoy and understand Australian stand-up .I have three friends( non South African) who I can phone in the middle of the night and say I am in trouble , who will fly out of their beds to be with me... and I will do so for them.I am passionate about my country and I love her WARTS and all. And warts are many. My husband has built up a successful business, and we live a comfortable life. My children are Australians, and my son who is a kind and loving intelligent boy has a tattoo on his back with two roses intertwined with all our initials. From my South African perspective I was unhappy- but from my Australian perspective it is a beautiful tattoo.He has a "rosy"-excuse the pun- future ahead of him. My daughter has a tiny little diamond in her nose and guess what? I like it. They are quite opinionated and they know where they are going and exactly how to get there. Not at all like we grew up, but I like them.I know I am waffling a bit here but I need people to understand that for me to be happy in Australia, truely happy, I needed to let go of my past. I initially struggled for months with the guilt that by throwing myself into my new country heart and soul, I was letting South Africa down. Maybe I have, but for me personally I needed to be happy, and the only way I personally could achieve this was by letting Africa go.Now, I go back to South Africa every year to see my parents and only sister. I feel like a visitor in South Africa. I love being with them and spending time with them but I am always in a hurry to come home.I can get really lyrical and emotional about the how I feel about the smell of eucalypts and the sunsets blah,blah,blah-but I wont . Just understand that if you want it, you will be able to feel that this is your home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just B Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Queensland Girl,Never a truer thing said, I'm still sitting on the dark side and waiting for my shot at the new life. I'm also worried about my wife who insists that she will never let go of Africa. I tend to live in the moment and for the future as a matter of habit. But your letter is wonderful, and I have shown my wife.ThanksK&B Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chester Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Hi Queensland Girl,I know just what you mean about accepting and loving life here. We made a packt never to go back Home even before we came to Australia, not even for a holiday. It helped us settle in quicker knowing there is no returning home, only forward, if Aus dosen't want us then New Zealand will. We came over with very little money and have worked hard to get where we are today.We smell the Eucalyptus and see the sunsets and even the sunrise, mostly with a flask of fresh coffee and a sandwick on the beach (fishing) and look up to the heavens on a dark night, seeing the milkyway in all its glory. We got this handreared pair of magpies that greet us first thing in the morning and they even share our cereal. Just one more reason why we can't wait to retire on our bit of heaven in the bush.regardsChester Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheBs Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Queensland GirlA beautiful opening of your heart. It gave me goosebumps Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sam Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Thank you for sharing your experience, it meant a lot to me. I sent you a pm.Regards, Sunflower Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest wilna Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Queensland GirlDankie, dat jy jou storie met ons gedeel het. Ek sal daaraan dink as ons in Aus is, moet sê ek is maar maar bang vir dit wat voorlê.Wilna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bronwyn Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Thanks QGThere are some truths in your story I will take on board.I wish we lived near you so I could visit & have a good natter, I think I could learn a bit from your business experiences... Bronwyn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindylou Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Brilliant post! Hope we manage to settle in the way your family has. Thanx for everything you do to help those who follow!C'Lou Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MzT Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Thanks for that great post Queensland Girl. You've hit the nail on the head and are an inspiration to everyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kangaroo Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 It was then that I realised that for me to really succeed in Australia I needed to stop straddling the Indian Ocean. One leg in Africa, One in Australia. I needed to put both feet here. And then, I changed my attitude.This is put so well, QG - thank you so much for sharing your personal story. It's inspiring, encouraging and an eye-opener. What I love about it is that is shows that attitude, commitment and perseverance are everything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
die Mulders Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Your post spoke straight to my heart...thank you...I needed it.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aramat Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Thanks QG!I loved your post, it is along the line of the attitude we hope to adopt right from the begining. We too will work at becoming Ozzies and hope for our daughter's sake she becomes one soonest! Life is about attitude, so we just need to get our attitude right for each situation and we will succeed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sheila2oz Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Hi QG.Dankie vir jou post. Dit help ons almal wat nog daar deur moet worstel. Sheila2Oz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ClanRogers Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Hi QGINSPIRATIONAL!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Parsons Family Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 QGYour story is one that is similar to others I have heard but I appreciate you putting out here for all to read. People need to know it is not a bed of roses (all the time) and that with the right attitude you can make it work. May your next 6 years here be even more rewarding CheersGaille Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest colton Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 QG,Good of you to share your story, when people meet you there is no mistaking the fact that you are truly passionate about Australia and best of all, HAPPY! Thanks for all you did for me.Colton Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aniena Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Thanks QGI hope that we will also get to that point where we are truly Aussies and will call Australia home. What you say is so true.RegardsAniena Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frenchy Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Queensland GirlThanks for your post. Inspirational.Frenchy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nilo Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Hi QGThank you for sharing! Good on you for persisting! You go girl!I wish it was more common for us as humans to learn from others "mistakes" instead of making them ourselves.I am going to take onboard everything you have shared and make it my own.LoviesNilo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pippa Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Dear QG,I am so inspired by your post! I hope that I would one day be able to post a similiar post, but at the moment it is still survival for me... QG,Good of you to share your story, when people meet you there is no mistaking the fact that you are truly passionate about Australia and best of all, HAPPY! Thanks for all you did for me.ColtonI agree with Colton and will forever keep on thanking your for all your help and constant advice - it is a privaledge to know you and you are a role model for many ! Lovies, Pippa! X Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Queensland Girl Posted October 17, 2007 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 Hi AllThanks for your kind replies. My hope with the post was to encourage those who feel "homeless". Some more thoughts have come to mind:Your friends become your new family.Do NOT compare the two countries. You are now here, it is forever, and its yours-for better and worse.Share in the triumphs and tragedies of your new country and countrymen.Allthough I support SAFFER support networks, be adventurous. There are many wonderful people out there who couldent care where you are from, pleased that you chose their country to be your new home, and would really like to get to know you.And you know what-?Even if South Africa turned into Nirvana tomorrow-I ain't going back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MANDYL Posted October 17, 2007 Report Share Posted October 17, 2007 I'm still standing with my one foot in RSA and my ohter foot in Australia because I still need to know how things are going there. We chat to families and friends over week-ends. We still need to do that because I think in the back of our mind we are scared they are going to forget about us. Contact will get less and less in time old friends we left behind will start making new friends, we will start making new friends here as well. All in due time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dedrei Posted October 18, 2007 Report Share Posted October 18, 2007 Hey Wizard, why don't you just cool it. Consider this your first warning, next time we will take action for your constant bickering & attacking of Colton and other members.Skuus julle. Thanks B vir 'n amazing post. Pity party mense probeer dit nou spoil. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spider Posted October 18, 2007 Report Share Posted October 18, 2007 QG,I agree with Colton - when we met you, you were open and sharing, and so positive and inspirational and warm...it was awesome, especially since we were feeling lost during that time on our LSD trip...unfortunately its been tough getting there, but we still pushing and hope to see you you at the Marina again... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tania Posted October 18, 2007 Report Share Posted October 18, 2007 QGBaie dankie vir jou eerlike en inspirerende post - dit beteken ongelooflik baie vir my ook!groete van huis tot huisTania Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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