Visiting SA for the first time

[K-Vdm]

We are going back for a visit in August (will be in Aus just over 2 years then)..

I am not sure how to feel? To be honest I am flippen scared!! I said to my husband I wonder if we would have been more excited (counting down the days) if we had initiated the visit?

My dad asked if we would consider coming for a visit - and asked to buy us tickets. In a matter of 4 days the tickets were booked and paid! My parents have been to Aus twice, so they know the life we live here. We did not plan on visiting for quite a number of years (at least not until we had citizenship)

Everyone keeps on asking if we are counting down the days, but we are actually so aprehensive

My parents (and most of our family) live in Jhb, and in the past few weeks 3 of our family/friends have been broken into/robbed..

My elder daughter keeps on asking me if we will be safe there, and I just say yes, we will be careful..

Any of you experience this fear?

[AnnieL]

I have to tell you, while South Africa is by no means a safe place, I don't think you need to be so scared. Stay away from the inner city, avoid isolated places, keep your car doors locked and your windows closed. Don't leave the residence doors unlocked and keep the gates closed. Don't leave stuff in your car. Think like a local and you will be fine.

Edited April 27, 2013 by AnnieL

[Donovan83]

The moment you land, you immediately go back to survival mode. It's what we grew up with for the first part of our lives and it never leaves you. You will be fine - in fact you'll probably enjoy it a lot at first and wonder why you left... then after a few days you realise you did the right thing

[Emille]

http://www.saaustralia.org/index.php/topic/39186-back-from-sa/

[Erik]

You'll be fine. it's not a complete war zone

[K-Vdm]

I think the reality of us going back is settling in and we are re-living the fears we had when we were there. And these fears were/are real and justified.. (I was robbed by gunpoint in front of my 3yr old daughter INSIDE her daycare, every single person in my family was either hi-jacked, robbed, mugged, broken into etc)..

We have grown so accustomed to the freedom we have here, and only my elder daughter slightly remembers how it was in SA..

I have travelled abroad before moving to Aus and remember everytime I got back to SA you automatically go back into "survival" mode.. It's instinct I guess..

Emille I read your post and it gave me good insight thanks. I am sure (hope) we will be ok.. and hopefully closer to the time fear will be replaced with excitement..

[Sharon]

I have just got back from a wonderful 3 weeks in Durban. It was one of the best overseas holidays I've had! It is such fun to catch up with friends and family and to visit all those places that were special.

For the first day or two I noticed the beggars and street kids. Thereafter I slotted straight back in as if I had never left. I never felt threatened or fearful and bear in mind I have been hijacked before. I was conscious that i kept leaving my bag on the front seat though.

You will love it.

[buzz]

On the bright side: We've just returned from our activation trip and found everything in SA to be extra cheap!!!!

[Sa2Nz2Oz]

Go with empty bags so you can buy some things on your list. Otherwise I agree just be aware as most South Africans are and you will be okay, RSA is not a war zone yet!

[AndreaL]

I do hope you enjoy it, remember to do a post as soon as you come back with your thoughts.

[Lyn]

K-Vdm - I am so sorry to hear about what happened to you whilst still in RSA. I too have had a gun held to my head and so has my daughter (12 at the time).

I don't know how you have dealt with being held up - but I thought I was fine.

I don't want to put you off going back to RSA, sometimes we just have to do these things - but I just want to share my experience. I decided after 3 years it was time to go back and see my mum. I went back on my own. I was fit and healthy, I had got my life back together again and was living a great life in Aus. The moment I landed in JHB my stress levels rose so much that I was hospitalised for most of my two week visit. I lost 10kgs in two weeks. And I will never forget the doctor telling me "this is what you get for abandoning South Africa".

This last year has been the most debilitating time for me - my body has still not healed. I refused to believe that PTSD could do this to someone and I have had every medical test / blood test etc done - and nothing presents itself.

I am in no way saying this is what is going to happen to you - but just want to share - that it can happen if you are extremely stressed and anxious.

Having said this, I did enjoy seeing family and friends. God luck with your decision, a tough one.

[HiQ]

Few years ago, my wife and i headed to CT and then to Jhb for my folks. We decided to take a buss to JHB after visiting my folks, where we were going to get cab to take us all the way back to the airport. What we didnt really realise, we were actually going to go to central JHB, to get a connecting buss. Didnt think much of that, how bad can it be.

Arriving in central JHB at what i think was the main buss depo, we couldnt have felt more out of place. I dont get scared easily, but standing there with my wife and a little one in a pram, trying to NOT draw attention us was a bit difficult considering my wife massive pink suitcase seemed to act as a beacon for all to take notice off. Im standing there trying to seem totally unphased, when my wife in her panic runs towards the first policeman she sees "to ask for directions". My heart sank to the floor, here we are looking totally out of place with a brightest pink suitcase you can ever imagine, little one and all and my wife runs to a police officer in front of all the folks that have us worried in the first place. I can only imagine what they must have thought about this white woman trying to take cover with a lone police officer in central JHB.

Whilst trying to blend in with the walls as much as possible, we couldnt find out where our connecting bus was and ended up in the most rickety volvo taxi. We just wanted to get out of doge lol. We got in, eyes still all over us from all angles, i began to pretend i was originally from the area and proceeded to talk to my wife, "telling" her about how i used to live near there etc. All the mean time tryimng to make sure this stranger hears im a "local" and thus will be less likely deviate form the whatever road goes to the airport (which ever road that was lol)

All this just because my thoughts were " i need to seem local" so we would maybe be less likely to get "kidnapped" lol. It seemed to work as we arrived safely at the airport, got out, got our stuff and stood there in silence for about 20mins.

Think all that time away form SA caused a over reaction lol, but ill never ever forget that trip.

I think the message here in all this is, plan properly, you dont want to be stuck somewhere without a clear plan

Edited May 20, 2013 by HiQ

[Riekie]

Too scared to go back - haven't been back since we left 10 years ago.

[Stell]

Had our first trip back after 8 years here - I just needed to see my family ! I was so worried that something would happen to my children and thought how would I forgive myself after getting them out of Africa safely if something were to happen to them now ??? The trip was over Christmas, so a couple of weeks in Zim with family and then to JHB and Durbs with other family. I knew Zim was a disaster but was SO shocked at the deterioration in South Africa since I'd last seen it - it was now a 3rd world Country ! The poverty and filth were the first things to hit me but then decided to concentrate on the positives and actually found people very friendly and service in shops and restaurants quite good. I hated being in homes that had domestic workers - I just felt so uncomfortable, thought how lazy everyone was especially children who just don't seem to do anything for themselves !!! I'm no domestic godess but I just don't miss them and would rather have an imperfect home than have domestics. I also found everyone seemed to be stuck in a time-warp almost - nothing had changed and we seemed to have changed so much, blossomed and grown. I enjoyed seeing family and friends but I just couldn't wait to get HOME !!!! Yes Home, Australia was HOME. So I think it is good to go back, not too soon though. First thing my kids noticed when we got home, driving along the motorway in Sydney was how clean it was and no people walking everywhere !!! Safe travels K-Vdm - hope you enjoy yourselves !!!

[Lovestory]

We are in the process of applying for PR now but one of the things I look most forward to about living in Oz is the (hopefully) annual trips back to Jhb where we will catch up with friends and family, do lots of shopping and eat at all our favorite places Hope it goes well.

[Springjock]

Are you sure you really want to emigrate? I can understand missing family but it sounds like you want to live in two countries at the same time. Its a recipe for disaster. If you arent 100% committed, then dont do it. Thats my two cents.

[Lovestory]

I hear ya Springjock. For the kids and all that. Obviously, we wouldn't visit SA every year and probably once we are there would not even really want to. Maybe every 5 years or so and on those visits, we'd focus on the (few) pro's. But certainly if you have been exposed to so much crime in SA, it must leave one feeling very apprehensive to visit.

[Springjock]

Its hard Lovestory, but you have to be clear what you want. Best of luck

[chzaau]

I don't recommend comming to South Africa, it is very dangerous. People are getting killed left right and centre.

Rather go to Iraq or Afghanistan, it is much safer.