Sommer net nonsense op 22 Februarie 2007

[Jan Stoof]

Sommer net nonsense op 22 Februarie 2007

Moeg, vrek moeg. Geen inspirasie. Sal maar plagiaat pleeg en ander ouens se stukkies plaas, met erkenning aan wie ook al. Dit kom van oud kollegas van beide myself en my vrou Annatjie vanuit RSA. Die eerste een is ‘n tipiese hedendaagse RSA storie. Die tweede een is presies soos wat ons so 40 jaar gelede in Wes Transvaal gepraat het. Ek onthou nog toe die juffrou vir ons vra om berg reekse in RSA op te noem het ek met “gopse” voorendag gekom. My pa’le het so gepraat.

A true South African ghost story

This true story happened in Soweto about a month ago.

A man was hitch hiking on a very dark night in the middle of a storm.

The night was rolling by and there was hardly a car on the road.

The storm was so strong that he could hardly see his feet in front of him.

Suddenly a car came towards him and stopped.

Without thinking, he got in and closed the door,just to realize that there

was nobody behind the steering wheel.

The car moved off slowly. He looked ahead and saw a curve in the road.

Scared, he started praying, begging for his life. He was terrified. Just

before hitting the curve a hand appeared through the window and turned the

steering wheel.

The man, now paralysed with fear, watched how the hand kept appearing every

time they got to a curve.

Gathering all his courage, he jumped out and ran to the nearest lights he

could see.

Wet and in shock, he went into a shabeen and asked for a double brandy.

After drinking it, he told everyone of the horrible experience he just had.

Everyone was silent when they realized he was crying.

About half an hour later, two men came walking into the shabeen and, on

seeing the terrified man, the one said to the other,"Mfowetu, isn't that

the idiot that got into the car while we were pushing ...?

FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T UNDERSTAND AFRIKAANS:

Verlede jaar het ek en my swaer en my skoonseun per vliegtuig na Windhoek gereis om veral die dierelewe van Namibie te besigtig.

Last year, me and my heavy and my cleanson traveled by flying harness to Windcorner specially to belook the animal-living in Namibia.

In die Noorde het ons toe volop springbokke, steenbokke, blesbokke, kameelperde en ook meerkatte gesien.

In the North we then saw full-up jumping goats, brick buck, bald buck, Camel horses and also more cats.

Een keer was ons senuwees egter skoon op hol.

One time genuine our sinews were clean on hollow.

Ons het agtergekom dat 'n luiperd besig was om ons te bekruip.

We aftercame that a lazy-horse was becreeping us.

In 'n oomblik was ons slaggereed met ons dubbelloop haelgewere.

In an uncle-tin we were slaughter ready with our double walk hail guns.

Toe die luiperd agter die bos roer, skiet ons almal gelyk.

When the lazy-horse mixed behind the bush, we all shot equal.

Na alles verby was, was ons hare baie deurmekaar. Ons het dit toe netjies gemaak, in die bakkie geklim en huis toe gery.

After all was past, our hairs were very through each other. We then made It into small nets, we climbed in the dish, and rode home.

So het ons lang, opwindende dag geeindig.

So did our long, wound-up day end!