Freetobe Posted July 27, 2010 Report Share Posted July 27, 2010 TOP TEN THOUGHTS Number 10Life is sexually transmitted.Number 9Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.Number 8Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.Number 7Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks. Number 6Some people are like a Slinky... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.Number 5Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. Number 4All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.Number 3Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00 and a substantial tax cut saves you $0.30?Number 2In the '60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT:We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America , but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of Immigration and Homeland Security.And the BONUS thought for todayâ€¦"Life is like a jar of jalapeno chilies. What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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