stress and abdominal pains

[abdul]

hi

would like some medical advice.my wife developed abdominal pains about two months ago.i started the immigration in ernest about two months ago.

we've been to our gp-precribed -antacid and pain killers.a week later a visit to the gynae-all clear.a day later a sonar -all in the clear.

a week later to another gp -ibs meds prescribed a..two weeks later laperoscopy done by gynae-clear except for small cyst not big enough to cause so much pain.cyst removed.g scope done as well- all in the clear.one week later back to gp due to severe pain.petadine given and sedatives.three days later another pain attack.gp suggest to a gastroentrologist.same day visit to gynae-gynae sugggest give it time.a week later(this morning)to the gastroentrolgist in milpak.thorough examination done .all in the clear.happy nothing abnormal found.worried why nothing was found.

i am hoping someone will give some insight to this phenomena which is worrying me.i do feel her so sorry for this pain she is going through.

here is my theory.lets say this immigration thingy is getting her so scared/nervous/stressed because it is like choosing between your aging parents and your husband.so the wife agrees we should immigrate but knows there is no one to look after her parents.so as everyday goes by you feel the "leave south africa"

and "my old parents?"

my question, can stress (of immigration) cause you to get stomach pains? no offence ,i dont believe in tooth fairies,pixies,tokoloshes,unicorns and the fairy god mother.

maybe somebody expierienced somthing like this.i am even prepared to forsake australia if it will make her better.sh1t even the opinon of a sangoma.

any advise will be much appreciated.will pm specifics.

[Deon-Louise and kids]

An interesting point I once heard "90% of illness have a psychosomatic origin."

This does not make the pain any less real but often the power of the mind can affect the body.

Never underestimate the power of the mind to affect the body!!!!

After we were robbed whilst we slept, my son had headaches with no apparent medical reason. ie not sinus or eyes or anything else --had it checked out.

Good luck to you and your wife in this extremely stressfull process

[abdul]

An interesting point I once heard "90% of illness have a psychosomatic origin."

This does not make the pain any less real but often the power of the mind can affect the body.

Never underestimate the power of the mind to affect the body!!!!

After we were robbed whilst we slept, my son had headaches with no apparent medical reason. ie not sinus or eyes or anything else --had it checked out.

Good luck to you and your wife in this extremely stressfull process

thanks

so true.this is what i feel.so does healing.the thought of a clinical psyhcologist would be so taboo if i were to bring it up.but to look at your closest in pain,you feel pain because of your inability to alleviate her pain.then there is the medical fraternity who are qualified and expierienced to help you , with all intents and purposes do to the best what their can.it is just so heartsore to see a person in constant pain.

[AndreaL]

Remember how you felt when you fell in love?

How you felt when you were separated from your love?

The first time you had a major disagreement?

The first timew you suffered a significant loss?

I spent 3 years working in a psychiatric admissions ward and firmly believe that the mind can cause physical illness.

I think you have hit the nail on the head- your wife is probably a dutiful daughter and the thought of leaving her parents is a cause of extreme stress- she also wants to be a supportive wife.

Of course there could also be a physical reason for her pain- so don't make her feel worse by focussing on the fact that you think her fears may be the cause of her pain.

The only solution here is good honest talk and lots of it and together you will come up with an answer.

[polly]

Stress can cause such pain. Hope she feels better soon.

Maybe you can give her an 'option'? Tell her you can start the process to take them over as soon as you qualify to sponsor them. Even if they don't want to go, you make the option available to them. Even if this is only a pipe dream, it might make things easier.

[Karen S]

Absolutely, stress can make you really ill. The mind is the most powerful of organs.

If everything thankfully has come back all clear - and she has had some pretty thorough and extensive testing done - then perhaps the next best thing would be to see a pychologist/ psychiatrist to help manage the stress levels she is enduring right now.

Perhaps she will fare better on mild anti- anxiety or anti- depression drug to help her get through this difficult time.

I understand exactly where your wife is coming from - I went through the same gut - wrenching fear of leaving my parents when we left for Canada back in 1993. It took me ages to work my way through it and I still remember it so well. It's pain like grief and it is very, very real. I was extremely close to my late Mom and I missed her even before we left, if you know what I mean.

Remember that immigration is up there with death and divorce in the stress stakes. Your wife needs all the support she can get right now and for everyone in her life to realise how much is suffering. She also needs to come to terms with the inevitable separation and perhaps have some goals set, for example, she will return to see her parents in a year, or they will come over to visit after some time etc.

Set up Skype as soon as you can when you get to your new home and ensure that your wife has access to it often so that she can see and chat to her loved ones often. She needs to realise that she is so much luckier than many of us were in our early days, in that she has all this wonderful technology at her finger tips and that she will not be entirely cut-off from everyone.

I wish you lots of luck and happiness in your new lives.

[abdul]

hi all

feel so messed up in my head right now.

in early may i posted a question about "stress and family".i should have known better.those were the tell tale signs that all was not well with o/h.i was living tomorrow today.i sat on the forum everyday like a bored housewife and just could not wait to tell her the latest topics.this must have caused an "information overload". coupled with the concern of her parents.little did i realise that she needed more time to digest.

we always laughed and than laughter stopped.now that she is so ill,i regret my selfish act.i want my wife and i to be happy again.if something were to happen to her,no place or person in the world could make me happy.

tlc is what is needed for her right now.

and if and when i go to oz, i want my wife laughing by my side.and if we stay in this sh*t hole of a country i want to be by her side laughing with her.

:lo

l:

[Karen S]

What a gorgeous wife you have.

Perhaps you need to go to therapy together and learn how to deal with the issues you are facing.

Perhaps you can put immigration on hold for a bit and just enjoy life together for a while?

You need to work on finding ways to cope and be happy again.

You can do it!

[abdul]

What a gorgeous wife you have.

Perhaps you need to go to therapy together and learn how to deal with the issues you are facing.

Perhaps you can put immigration on hold for a bit and just enjoy life together for a while?

You need to work on finding ways to cope and be happy again.

You can do it!

hi karen s.thanks for the compliment and advice.

i feel so much better.

as for therapy it is very much frowned upon as it believed for "maal mense".and andreaL l thank you for being supportive and so helpful.

[Michele R]

Hi Abdul,

You clearly love your wife very much, and I can see why, she's beautiful.

I think, maybe, you should sit down and talk things through with her and ask her how she's feeling about the whole process.

Which visa will you be applying for? And where do you want to go?

It might help to introduce her to the forum so she can ask questions and get to know some people who might have experienced the same feelings.

I luckily don't get abdominal pain, but I tend to make myself nauseous...so ever since we've done the medicals and sent away the police clearances things have become so final, I find that I'm constantly feeling nauseous (think I'm nervous, lol). I think we all experience our emotions in a different way, thing is, she's probably not even aware that it's stress that's causing her to feel ill.

I think it is important for her to know that moving to Aus isn't final, hopefully you will be able to come and visit or her parents can come and visit you. Also, make sure they have internet, a web cam and skype and then you can chat to them every now and then and get to see them.

As you said, maybe it's just information overload and she needs time to digest it all.

I really hope she starts to feel better soon and that you both begin to laugh again!

All the best,

Michele

[Toitjie]

Abdul, for what its worth, I am one of those people who get stress tummy aches where other people get migraines. It does sound like your wife's is very serious, mine goes away after a couple of hours, but I believe its due to stomach acid thats produced when I experienc high levels of stress. It also happens when I dont eat and encounter very stressfull events.

[abdul]

Abdul, for what its worth, I am one of those people who get stress tummy aches where other people get migraines. It does sound like your wife's is very serious, mine goes away after a couple of hours, but I believe its due to stomach acid thats produced when I experienc high levels of stress. It also happens when I dont eat and encounter very stressfull events.

hi toitjie

does stress tummy ache feel like a leaking sensation on your right side just below the rib cage?say in the region of the transverse colon?and does it feel like a lump?and does the pain move toyour left?

[Joefromsa]

Hi Abdul

I have two suggestions...

Firstly, take your wife to Fordsburg and treat her to great lunch... best Indian restaurants are in Forsburg.

Secondly, you gotta take the wife on an LSD to Aus... let her see it for herself... promise you she will have no more pains... you will end up with all the pains... because she will nag at you to speed up the process.

Best of luck...

[Toitjie]

hi toitjie

does stress tummy ache feel like a leaking sensation on your right side just below the rib cage?say in the region of the transverse colon?and does it feel like a lump?and does the pain move toyour left?

Abdul, I sent you a message

[abdul]

hi all

blood and urine test results came today.everything is clear except extra spillage of proteins in the urine.no inflammation on kidneys.possibly a ut infection not related to abdominal pain.systolic pressure is 150. heart rate could be due to pain.

i truly dont know what to do.

[Karen S]

Abdul,

You have to get past this idea that therapy is for 'maal' people!

Perhaps that was the case back in the good old days, but I can assure you it is no longer.

Just as the body can get ill, so the mind sometimes also needs treatment. It does not have to involve medication, or it might, but whatever the case, it can be of enormous help to get an objective opinion and to work with a professional.

Believe me, even in SA, there are many, many people undergoing this kind of treatment. Perhaps they do not speak about it ( and you do not need to share it with anyone, if that is your wish), but there are no poor medical folk in that field!

If you really want to help your wife regain her peace and be happy again, you have to do everything possible to achieve that, even if it means getting therapy.

Give it a try - you may be very pleased with the results, and if it is not for you, you know you have given it a bash. It will, at the very least, give you both the coping skills you need for this huge venture and open the lines of communication.

[Dirtbikerider]

Have you considered acupucture????

If you are interested I could give you the number of a fantastic chinese lady that has been treating my family for the last couple of years.

PM me.

Hilton Berry

[chalmers family]

hi,

for what is is worth i am suffer from terrible and horiffic stomach cramps and headaches- sure it is all stress related.

Stress can do hectic things to us!

[Sibella]

Have you tried seeing a homeopath?

I was quite stressed at a job while still in South Africa and started getting horriffic stomach aches. So bad that I could not drive my car when I got them.

I went to a homeopath and I never got them again. I soon after changed jobs to something more peaceful and permanent which also helped - but the homeopathic remedies definitely worked.

Also for my kids - my little one who is now 3 has never been on antibiotics. Just a pity they are so expensive here in the UK!!

Try asking around to find a good one in your area.

Edited June 25, 2009 by Sibella

[justD]

Hi Abdul,

I have some stomach pains as well, but first let me say this:

and if and when i go to oz, i want my wife laughing by my side.and if we stay in this sh*t hole of a country i want to be by her side laughing with her.

With a loving husband like you she has nothing to stress about. Just make sure your wife knows how important her happiness is to you and that you're not going to force/pressure her into anything.

As for me, I've also been from doctor to doctor (all GPs) and various medicines to figure out what my pains are. Recently I went for a colonoscopy and a gastoscopy, but again the gastroentrologist or whoever didn't find anything. I was worried about either bowel cancer or an ulcer, but he assured me that I have nothing like that to worry about. Now he's put me on some muscle relaxant (Mobic) and I've also been back on Nexium for a couple of weeks. Since starting the Mobic I thought the pains were much better until 2-3 days ago when I woke up from the pain again. So I don't think I'm much help to you. I don't know what the answer is, but apparently I'm not dying yet.

I've seen enough of doctor's rooms for a while now, so I've actually decided I'll just lose a bit of weight and stay on this Mobic and Nexium for a while to see how it goes.

Hope your wife feels better soon and let me know if you figure it out

- Dirk

[rozellem]

Hi Abdul, hope you and the wife are doing well. Just throwing my 2c in the pot here as well. Different people experience stress in different ways, some, like your wife experience a emotion in a very real physical way. And it is NOT in the mind. My mom has had a few times in her life where serious stress have given her severe pressure on her chest (bedrukking op die bors). She would wake up in the night feeling as if there was literally someone standing on her chest and struggling to breathe. She is not normally one for any non conventional medicine, but I got her a few sessions with a very good aromatherapist that actually came to her house to massage her. This woman just released the pressure and after the second session she never got this problem again. Hope this help, good luck.

[abdul]

Have you tried seeing a homeopath?

I was quite stressed at a job while still in South Africa and started getting horriffic stomach aches. So bad that I could not drive my car when I got them.

I went to a homeopath and I never got them again. I soon after changed jobs to something more peaceful and permanent which also helped - but the homeopathic remedies definitely worked.

Also for my kids - my little one who is now 3 has never been on antibiotics. Just a pity they are so expensive here in the UK!!

Try asking around to find a good one in your area.

hi sibella

listen to this.i was so engrossed with things i missed your post.anyway,on the 27 th june we went to see a homeopath.they do live blood analysis.this is truly amazing to see technology and herbalism combined.lots of toxins in the blood,rod bacteria and small white blood cells.

homeopathic medicine and a strict diet was prescribed.treatment started on mon 29 th june.on thur 2nd july a major relief from the pain.

on fri 3rd july. second appointment to homeopath.the doctor was very happy with the live blood analysis.much of the bacteria was gone and the white blood cells increased in size.the doctor went a litte easy on the diet as well as the medication.i was happy,the doctor was happy and most importantly-the wife was happy.

five days after medication!!

the doctor decided to do a physical examination and was applying pressure on the abdominal area and you know what the pain was back. and has not subsided as yet.it is not the homeopath doctor's fault. she was merely trying to help.

this morning the doctor phoned me to ask if there was any improvent.it was suggested to stop all medication and do a ct scan at the gastroentrologist.

i dont know what to say but that sh1t happens and happens and happens and happens and happens.

somone wrote on the forum??

"roses are red,violets are blue.deal with it!"

hoping for a miracle.i truly feel for those in pain.

[Karen-in-Brisbane]

Hi Abdul

I have had stomach pains for about 16months.... almost started when we began the process in ernest. I take Nexium daily and it is fine - but if I miss my tab once the pain is back. Feels like a stone stuck in my upper stomach and it burns. I feel for your wife cos I find this process of leaving everything familiar to me and especially my family and both parents........ I feel very stressed and worry a whole lot about a whole lot. I get sad, then I feel ok and so it goes ......... I tell myself all the right positive things but even so I wonder if we will be sad in Oz and if that happens this process will be for nought cos what is the point of being miserable? Then I tell myself that I will be happy cos I will have the right attitude and I will back myself...and hubby and son to make it!!! (But the fears remain............)

K

[abdul]

Hi Abdul

I have had stomach pains for about 16months.... almost started when we began the process in ernest. I take Nexium daily and it is fine - but if I miss my tab once the pain is back. Feels like a stone stuck in my upper stomach and it burns. I feel for your wife cos I find this process of leaving everything familiar to me and especially my family and both parents........ I feel very stressed and worry a whole lot about a whole lot. I get sad, then I feel ok and so it goes ......... I tell myself all the right positive things but even so I wonder if we will be sad in Oz and if that happens this process will be for nought cos what is the point of being miserable? Then I tell myself that I will be happy cos I will have the right attitude and I will back myself...and hubby and son to make it!!! (But the fears remain............)

K

so sorry to hear you suffer as well.

your description resembles that of raziya's.are you referrring to the area below the rib cage with pain on your right side travessing to he left?and and does it feel like acid?

this thread will benefit alot of people and save them big bucks if we can safely document our expierience.

we r going and just d do you guys suffer with constipation? please pm if you must

[worth the wait]

This sounds a lot like IBS. When I lived in SA I used to suffer with this for years, it is stress and anxiety related and I know this for sure because once I had left my rather stressful job in SA it improved loads and once I had left SA it was gone once and for all. IBS is extremely painful and come with diarrhoea or constipation. It is the most terrible condition to suffer with as there is no actual medication that willl help 100% just things like colofac and buscopan relieve the symptoms

Maybe she needs some treatment for anxiety and which might relieve the tummy pains.

Good Luck