The Boer & Aussie Labour

[Guest Mauritz]

I'm writing this for all those people who are so worried about not finding a job, the exchange rate, those worried about what Mev Dominee will say, those yuppies that don't know how to fill up their own car - in other words, all those uncertain souls.

We arrived June 1996 with nothing - two backpacks, 4 legs, 4 arms & 2 heads full of rubbish. The one head is as arrogant as you can get, nothing can get this Boer head 'Down Under.' The other head, the one with the beautiful blond hair is more sensible, more uncertain & more worried. We didn't know a soul in this country, no LSD those days - we don't take drugs, thank you.

I immediately wanted to start doing anything - at that stage I knew about people that traveled the world, doing things that we Souf Efricans regarded as way, way beneath us. The other head .......... not so certain. So we traveled in a 'Yellow Submarine' - Hi ace Camper Van. We didn't work. At one stage in Darwin I deciced, stuff this - told the wife I'm going 'window shopping,', but I visited a few 'job agencies.' Inside is a computer - you type in the state, the area and it spits out all the work available - work everywhere, millions of jobs - you can then approach the pretty girl and apply for the job.

We had PR long before we set foot Down Under. These pretty little things that's supposed to find you a job wanted to know if we were on CentreLink - fancy word for Dole or Government handouts. I'm as angry as a bush pig on Viagra. "We Souf Efricans will NEVER NEVER make use of this pathetic system," I told her. She pulled her pretty little nose up and said that I can't apply unless I'm on CentreLink. You can imagine - this Boer's blood pressure went up and up and up - the aircon couldn't keep up.

I won't translate the Afrikaanse poetry that suddenly 'took form' - I spoke in tongues - Kwangali, Zulu, Xhosa and German. How can these people dare to even mention the bleddy Dole to a Souf Efrican???? Later I learned that these agencies survive by keeping people off the Dole. If you're not on it, then you're obviously smart enough to find a job yourself. They don't want to know you. Anyhow, I decided to travel, fish & hunt - then stop somewhere and start my own business. Which I did.

Many, many years later I decided to study - went to Uni, while running a business part time - babies in the house, a very, very 'kwaai' wife etc. Finished the degree, only to be able to say that I'm a yuppie too. Very little money, I decided to work for a while and set my business up. Hoping that the system had changed, I approached one of these 'jobless agencies.' Same bleddy thing, but I don't want to go and look for work - it is right there in front of me on the bleddy PC. I fill in all the forms for CentreLink, knowing that I'll be working long before they can pay me - then I can tell them to go and stuff ...... you know what.

That's exactly what happened - with the 'beggars' paper in the hand, I got a job on a vegetable farm - one of these large producers that grow for Woolworths and Coles. They liked this Boer - the fact that I was in the army and that I have a Science degree - they want a manager.

I must start from scratch - if I make it, they tell me, they'll make me Manager. I must have 'gum boots', a sharp knife, a sharpener etc. I start at daybreak and bring my own 'jam blik' for coffee and own white bread - are you getting the picture??

Let me tell you, it was the lowest day of my life. Here I am, a Boer - now I'm going to cut cabbage like a Maputu. Man, I just wanted to run and take the risk, starting my business up ........... again ........ with nothing. I'll never forget the negative feelings I had that day.

Stuff this I decided - #$%^ the gum boots, I'm not a bleddy Tata. If I survived the Grens in my army boots, army boots it'll be. I turn up and I meet the mixed grill - Chinese, a Russian, Aussies and whatever. A huge, huge Aussie girl smiled at me - two of me make up one of her hips. "You were in the army weren't you??", she asked. Her ex husband was in the army she told me - she can see by the way I tied my shoe laces. I could see love and lust in her eyes - I just wanted to run.

Two strict Aussie aunties took the new ones aside and showed me how to cut a vegatable - can you believe that?? We were chucked in the 'line' - 9 of us in a row - we followed a tractor with a long side arm - a rubber belt. This bleddy tractor moved man, you bend down to cut a cabbage, if you look up - the bleddy thing is way over there - worse than the army.

My luck - this huge girl was next to me and a mad Chinaman on the other side. That Chinaman didn't take any nonsense of a cabbage - he stretched his arm out to the heavens, suddenly developing a hatred look in his eyes, the Wham that knife followed through ........ one dead cabbage and I must dive to the side, because that knife followed a vicious curve all the way up to the heavens. This mad Chinaman on the left and every time I try to escape to the right - my head right into the backside of that big girl - looked and felt like full moon on the African planes. You can imagine the skill I had to develop to keep up - duck, dive, pull my head out and drop a cabbage - all in one move. That was my first day.

Later I found out that some of those blokes and sheilas worked on that farm for donkey years. One heard that I am in possession of I degree - a filthy bleddy thing, according to him - I knew I' was classed as a 'toll poppy'. He told me that in school he thought the science class was there to teach him how to make bombs - you get the picture????

These blokes and sheilas are tough man, they can cut cabbages and they want to show this Wog that he'll never be better than them. This Boer is a Boer man, I quickly learn and soon I'm murdering those cabbages - I soon cut that big girl's as well - she's in love.

Very quickly I'm sorting these cabbages - it's done on that trailer - it's sorted, washed and packed. You must make up the boxes as well. You sweat like a pig. We do lettuce and celery as well. You just won't believe how organised this whole machine is.

A few weeks later I'm on the tractors on the irrigation and in the packing house. Soon I made enough money and I left - them very disappointed and I felt fairly guilty. I started my business.

Later I met the Chinese family - they came to Aus with nothing. Soon they opened a restaurant with a new Mercedes as well. This whole experience opened my eyes. The big girl used to be an office girl - her life turned out for the worse and she decided to go and do 'hard labour' so that she can loose weight and get on her feet at the same time.

One bloke's wife was in a wheelchair, he was a permanent carer. Whenever someone relieved him, he worked on the farm. I met a few other students - divorced older blokes, overseas visitors, backpackers and just retired couples who wanted to work and travel.

I started to look at Aus and the Aussies in a different way. I reflected on my own country and nation. I started to take notice of young blokes in trades, the cleaning ladies, the gardeners. All these people were happy hardworking people, making a good living.

My whole outlook on life changed and it got easier later to take anything on. I learned a lot, I met interesting people, I left all the baggage behind. I started a new life.

Edited June 2, 2008 by Mauritz

[Biker]

I was wondering about that ....degreed and doing manual labour.

During my stay in London one day went to do packing at a warehouse for Marks & Spencer I think it was. I was the lucky winner on a Monday morning to clean out all the rubbish bins as the cleaner bloke didn't show. And I'm talking about those big rubbish bins, just one size down from the ones you need to lift with the machines. And they throw everything in that bins. My job was to transfer the content of these bins into another huge machine that presses it onto some sort of skip.

Anyway, so there I was facing rows & rows of bins with everything from the weekend's old coffee and left over eggs from sunday breakfast and....well, next thing I made my own contribution to the existing rot in there. Rather white in the face, I decided to make one last contribution and promptly left without even saying goodbye.

I did call the agency and gave them a piece of my mind as I understood packing to be clothes and boxes etc... not garbage can cleaner. I've clearly not got the stomach for it, nor did they ensure I have the qualification to operate the machine and therefor contravening the labour law and how would they feel if I had an accident or report it. Thought I was dof?

The irony for me was that me and my fellow workers (most of them also held degrees) were more skilled to do the job of the people managing us or even them.

Thankfully I took a job more suited to my degree the next week.

[Guest Mauritz]

I was wondering about that ....degreed and doing manual labour.

I've been wondering about that one for years Ten minutes ago, I was outside hanging the horses hay nets for the night. It's raining, it pitch black and there's something in the air - I've been 'feeling' it for weeks now. Suddenly, in a split second, everything 'cleared' up - I've been stuck here for weeks now - a real 'papierdier' - I can't wait to go bush again.

I'm slowly changing my business to rural fencing & welding - I'm taking on 20km's of stock fencing in 'Whoop Whoop' as a test. Then I'm going to build the biggest fencing business Down Under.

I'm going walkabout again - I'm taking my bow, horses & old Rufus with - I'm going bush. I'm going to leave as soon as possible - maybe tomorrow. It's time to go.

I hope Biltongboer and the others are going to pile the stories up.

[Biltongboer]

I've been wondering about that one for years Ten minutes ago, I was outside hanging the horses hay nets for the night. It's raining, it pitch black and there's something in the air - I've been 'feeling' it for weeks now. Suddenly, in a split second, everything 'cleared' up - I've been stuck here for weeks now - a real 'papierdier' - I can't wait to go bush again.

I'm slowly changing my business to rural fencing & welding - I'm taking on 20km's of stock fencing in 'Whoop Whoop' as a test. Then I'm going to build the biggest fencing business Down Under.

I'm going walkabout again - I'm taking my bow, horses & old Rufus with - I'm going bush. I'm going to leave as soon as possible - maybe tomorrow. It's time to go.

I hope Biltongboer and the others are going to pile the stories up.

If I keep up my stories, I might end up in big trouble...

[Morrie]

One thing I have learnt in this country, it's mostly our pride that cause us heart ache!

thse Aussies and their " cut-the-Tall-poppy syndrome" is a hard thing to learn.

but those that learn the lesson, adapt and are as happy as a pig in Palestyne!

[Biker]

MAuritz, jy beter daai draadtrektang reghou - ek kom leen hom nog om so draadjie of 2 om my kaya te span sodat die donkies nie wegloop nie.

[SHIRLS]

Another great read M ,I would gladly have joined this forum just to read your brilliant ramblings...........more power to you mate.My BH thinks that I have a secret on-line lover as I cannot wait to get onto the forum of an evening.Now I've had to let him into my naughty little secret so he is also reding the Life and Times of Mauritz Down Under.Good luck with the fencing venture !

Shirls