"See you in the Under Down" - our journey of arrival after drifting

[Marilise]

I missed the 'shame' bit? Please explain as I am also one to Ag shame, to easily!

Toitjie, in which area do you guys stay? And which school are you enrolling your kids into?

Edited December 3, 2013 by Marilise

[Toitjie]

hi Marilise

apparently "shame" in ozzie language has a more negative connotation. For south Africans, or me rather, if you tell me your mother is ill I will say ag shame, that is horrible.

but if a kids in Oz falls down and you say shame, it means "shame on the bad mother for letting her kid fall" or something to that effect

we stay in Nicholls and after much agonising over schools we have decided to enrol them in Gold Greek. for years the choice has been Amaroo which is a great school. But at the last minute I decided on Gold Creek. On of the biggies for me is bullying and I believe that the more "other" kids in a school the less "you/me" (as in you=foreign and me=Australian) there will be. In Gold Creek there are kids from 44 different nationalities - lots of diplomat kids etc so Im hoping that with the diverse culture, things will be easier on them

we are blissfully happy in Nicholls. I had no idea what to expect and we were really positively surprised. I love the house we are in, we love the area and Im hoping the school will be great too! So far have heard only good things and even their Naplan results are very good

Another update...thanx to HEOJ I have a GPS again! Im so impressed, thanx S! Works like a charm!

[HadEnoughofJuju]

Glad it worked.

[Aneldari]

Just on the topic of "Ag, shame", you could use "it's/that's a shame" which is more commonly used...

[Alida]

As far as I know, only South Africans uses 'ag shame' as an expression of sympathy or pity. Most of the English world knows it in it's original form: something to b ashamed of. So if a child should fall and you say 'ag shame', you're actually telling everybody around there that somebody should be ashamed of this happening !! "Poor little thing" might be more appropriate . Only my perspective ...

[21yearsoutofrsa]

In South Africa "ag shame" means cute.

Not in the rest of the English speaking world. If you want to say cute, say cute in Australia.

[Toitjie]

7 December

As usual it is with difficulty that I remember what we have done the past week Its not that we are that busy, but we do mission around a lot and after a week you just cannot remember what you were busy with!

All our admin is finalised though. I completed a 47 paged doc for Centrelink and it took all of 10 minutes with a consultant to get set up so that is out of the way. We took the kids to their school yesterday and Gold Creek looks like a very nice school. I got a good vibe from the parents I saw, the kids and overall impression is very positive.

The school clothes were a huge shock to my system. I have been told there are 2 shops and thats it. And also that Gold Creek got a brand new design so I went to where they told me and for both kids, summer, winter and sports clothes, it was $600. I was quite upset and very depressed. That is a LOT of money. And tonight we had a BBQ with people we met on FB and was told I could buy school clothes at K-Mart or Less&More or something like that. I will go and have a look but I have already paid (20% discount if I paid today ) so I dont think she will just refund me! Dunno...its ridiculous

When we got back tonight there was an email waiting for me. Bad news. Lucy failed her leptospirosis test and will not fly on Tuesday. They will test again on Monday and get the results on Wednesday. My fear is now what if she fails again? Where did she get this seeing as she is in quarantine? How the hell did this happen? Im a little distraught by this news, I dont want to hear that after everything we have been throuhg, all the costs and trauma to the poor dog, that we cannot bring her into Australia. I will have to read further about this disease and whether its serious enough to be refused entry.

I have realised one thing today. The complicatedness of the visa application, the rush of making arrangements, the trauma of landing, the chaos of all the admin after landing and starting to build a new identity - it's nothing compared to the intricacies of the human race. How delicate relationships are, how careful you have to be. Meeting and making new friends isn't as easy as it sounds. I listen to what people tell me and it seems there are a lot of politics and"stuff" so I will see how it goes. If things get too complicated I tend to just withdraw....I dont want to get involved in in-fighting in groups. I just want friends. People that we can trust and have a dinner with, chat for hours. The people we met tonight were very nice. I felt comfortable and happy to be there. Slowly but surely we are settling...it does take longer..and I think it does take a little of your mojo or energy to start new bonds with strangers...but it's worth it in the end.

[Alida]

Aaaah, Toitjie, even if you just relocated to another town in South Africa, you would have had to get behind the inside politics of the new circles of people you get into. Just the magnitude of the immigration itself makes settling in emotionally a much more daunting task than moving locally. Hang in there and give yourself and other people time. Welcoming a stranger in a settled circle of known people has it's challenge for the locals there, too. You'll get in somewhere where you feel you really belong, but it does take time. You does not sound like an offensive kind of person to me at all, so I guess you'll be easy on the Ozzies.

[Marilise]

Will keep Lucy in our prayers, that she will pass her test and fly to her family very soon.

[BriD]

Keeping Lucy in my thoughts and prayers!!!

[Kurkprop]

Keeping my fingers crossed for some good news x

[McCabes]

Crossing fingers for Lucy and really hope she passes the test!

Re uniforms I think it's somewhat like here - we were told there are two suppliers of the school uniform, but really I could buy white shirts and grey shorts from Woollies for half the price of those at the uniform shop, and just iron on the school badges, so I would definitely look around.

Hugs! thinking of you

[Toitjie]

12 December

First of all, Lucy is ok I think. I have completely fallen to pieces when I read the email saying she failed that test, and then I googled leptospirosis and after that I was a wreck. Its a horrible illness. If they had just told me she is not actually sick, she just has a higher than normal blood count for that bacteria, it might have saved my box of kleenex

Either way...they told me the new test was done on Monday and I would have the result on Wednesday. Last night I stayed up until midnight and when there was still no email, I phoned. Oh..they say...the lab didn't do the test on Monday but only yesterday so I will have the results on Friday *sigh*

But I do feel a lot better after the weekend. I guess its to be expected that a small trigger will cause a huge downpour

Yesterday we went to the Arboretum, where I met a fellow forumite which was just lovely! I am starting to have some hope again....making friends is not the easiest thing in the world and will take some time. The Arboretum has the most amazing play area that the kids really enjoyed.

Today we went to the ice rink with another forumite which was just as lovely! Even me got on the ice! That was really so nice, its been 2 decades since I last skated, and although I wish I can become an ice dancer like this lovely lady, it is with wistful regret that I think how my father warned me many years ago that you only have one back, and sadly, I never listened and now I have back problems like those of a 70 year old. I wish I could go back in time and look better after myself I will never be able to do what they do on the ice, one fall and Im finished. But I did get better after a few rounds...it brought back many good memories of good old Sterland's ice-rink in the middle of Pretoria..I cant believe we use to hang out there as high school kids. Nowadays I wonder if that rink even exists anymore.

Anyway...I digress....

Hubby got a job! We are really ecstatic. Its a casual job at Big-W and we still have to do the online induction. It seems he starts next week Tuesday. At least its a start. Its true though that its not what you are but who you know. We got a referral from someone to go and see someone...you know how it goes, and through this network he was able to land this casual job. Me - Im still applying here and there and am supposed to start my volunteering on Monday but will only continue if he works night shifts. Otherwise, I will have to stay at home and look after the kids. No way they will stay at home alone (anyway I don't think its allowed to leave kids at home unattended under a certain age)

I write this journal, another journal via email to friends and family back home, various personal emails etc. So Im talking a lot..and I get the faintest of an idea (just guessing because no-one said anything specific) that some people slightly raise an eyebrow when I talk about shopping at Salvo's, Green Shed or Vinnies And not only peeps from SA either so this is interesting.... I of course love a little good natured stirring so I don't mind at all talking about it. I feel proud of what I have found so far at these shops!

I can just hear the skinnering back home...."good gosh did you hear??? they shop at the salvation army and he got a job as shelf assistant" (or something like that) I just know that this kind of culture is generally very misunderstood by people back home, but I honestly don't give a rat's ass (can I say that?) I told my forum friend that one of the most liberating things I have experienced so far is that I don't care about stuff, I like new things like anyone else, but I also like vintage stuff, I like op-shopping, I crave a job where I can repack shelves for them! I don't mind in the least that we are starting right at the bottom. I don't mind what kind of job we get, as long as we can start earning dollars...the bills need to be paid. Later on..I can refocus my career on what I studied, or I can make a career change and do something completely different. Who knows what the future holds.

I know this - if you are not flexible, you will not make it. If you have a very rigid set of ideas and ideals and "must have's" - you are in trouble.

[McCabes]

Loving your attitude!!!!

I don't think it's strange, we will be doing the same (in all likelihood) if/when we get there.

I think whatever works for you and makes you happy: do that.

[Marilise]

You are so right Toitjie! We are already telling everyone that we will take any job we can get, even if it is cleaning out the rubbish bins (they do not earn bad salaries ), as long as it is a foot in the door and bread on the table and roof over your head, who are we to complain and who are the rest to judge? Cannot wait to meet you in the Under Down next year! We are planning to arrive in Canberra last week of Jan 2014.

[followmylead]

I love op shops! Great bargains!

[Toitjie]

Quick update - they let me know somewhere during the night (go figure) that she passed her test and will be flying out on 18 December!

I am so happy right now I could wag my tail ...this is the best news in a long while. I never thought I would feel this lost without a pet, but this just confirmed that this was the best choice to make, for us and her...and I for one cannot wait to be reunited with that brave little dog!

[followmylead]

Yay! That is a great Christmas prezzie.

[Marilise]

Yippie - soon Lucy will be a Ausiedog!!

[Toitjie]

Yippie - soon Lucy will be a Ausiedog!!

lol...we will have to start teaching her some ozzie slang

[tersiava]

Great news

[HansaPlease]

lol...we will have to start teaching her some ozzie slang

Yeah, tell her not to say "woof ekse!" in the park. The locals just won't get it...

[Mara]

Lucy will also have to learn some doggie swear words, the language I sometimes hear in the park definitely sounds a bit off colour! Then again, she could just look down her nose at them and tell them that she is a "lady" from RSA and that they are not quite her sort!

I am so happy for you, I can just imagine how devastated you must have been at the news of the test she failed!

By the way, I have a Lucy as well, just of the feline kind!

[Toitjie]

lol Mara...Lucy is a sweet little dog but no lady! She is a hound dog she might just teach these Canberra dogs some new tricks!

Btw - Lucy is such a cool name isn't it?

[Toitjie]

17 December

Ok...so onto some more serious things. I first thought I should do a new thread about jobs but in the end, everything that happens to us are related, so I will stick to this journal for now. When Im GM for a super duper company I will do a new thread

Me

I started with my volunteering work on Monday (yesterday). I am volunteering in the HR division so Im learning all the ins and outs of how things are done here. I have to say this to everyone still coming without jobs - if at all within your power, try to do volunteering work, especially if you can do it in an environment that is similar to your core skills. There are many upsides to doing things this way. The downside for me is working in Tuggeranong and living in Nicholls which is 36 km apart and heavy on my "little" car petrol wise...*sigh* but the upsides are that Im learning HR the ozzie way with a valid referee who can vouch for what I learned and transferred knowledge successfully.

Furthermore...if you are a little scared of new situations like me (I detest new situations) then volunteering takes the stress away to a large extent. This is purely psychological but because Im working for free I don't feel as stressed as I would have walking into a new situation as a paid employee and for me personally, this has worked out well.

So the office. the ozzies accepted me as far as I could tell, they were very nice to me, I chatted with a few of them and even met a Ngunawwal princess who is also working there, so its inclusive and was really nice. There is as much office politics as anywhere else and I listened without comment with a smile in my heart to all the issues and complaints...it was as if I was back in SA

I know that office courtesy says we don't say what we did back home, so I was happy to do whatever was sent my way, which is a great learning curve, even to get personnel files and typing letters, filing files again etc. While I will not say anything there, I can add here that I think we are a little ahead in SA in terms of HR. I think maybe it has something to do with our strong union presence but the area I worked in in SA had many more stronger workplace procedures and policies in place, we were also generally more organised and more electronically advanced. My boss, a fellow South African, told me this as she has worked in several companies both private and public. But it's all good, I don't mind in the least. Its good to see how things are done from the bottom upwards.

Hopefully this will be a pathway to a job opportunity in that organisation.

Hubby

he started working today at Big-W, in Woden which is 8km from me, so everything is happenin' in the South! we should have moved there, its where all the jobs are it seems. But anyway..he seems happy. He got his shifts today which is 12pm to 6pm every day so now I can fit my volunteering into the mornings and he works in the arvo's

The work he is doing is at the loading dock but its a foot in the door. He has a compulsory 1 hour lunch (I wish I had!) so they are looking after them. What made me smile is the reality versus what they want the reality to be. His induction was a 3 hour online course. Every single sentence was about the team, respect for one another, how sexual harassment will lead to dismissal, how any swearing or whatever will not be tolerated etc. Basically it sounds like you really have to watch your step and just keep quiet...but in reality he told me..the guys are swearing like sailors, pinching butts happened a few times so its funny...and in all the turmoil of getting there, starting a new day, he forgot the parking meter.

Here they don't have a meter for every car. You just park and go to a machine nearby, put in coins and a little receipt prints which you then put back in your car's window. So he forgot and got a $91 fine. Ouch. I don't know whats more disturbing...the high amount of the fact that its such a weird amount

First thing this morning he was told he would have to work Christmas and this Saturday so he would be missing our whole week in Batemans Bay over the Christmas holidays. But then later the supervisor said he will give the team off 25 and 26 December so now he misses only a couple of day, for which we are eternally grateful.

If he works well he might be appointed permanently in a couple of weeks, and then getting more perks so I think all in all, things are really working out nicely. Im so happy for him...he thought I would get a job first and now he is the one who brings in money!

And Lucy will fly out tomorrow...I hope that she is ok in the airplane..I cannot imagine what must be going through her little head and as they may not be sedated, she will probably be scared..so I just hope she is all right after this ordeal. We will try to visit her in Sydney but its so far that I don't think its going to happen more than once or twice at most.

Edited December 17, 2013 by Toitjie