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stress and family


abdul
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hi all

i was curious.did everyone have stress when they considerd to make that move.i mean in the last 3 weeks i have only been researching.

the wife and i have been discussing about our options and tonight i really saw how she is feeling.ag shame, i feel so bad.

as for myself,i feel like i am in a spin dryer on 'extra heavy load 'settings and someone forgot to switch the machine off!!

i cannot sleep and when i do,it would be for a few hours. 3 at the most.

as for cigarettes,jeez,you would be tempted to say i am the owner of british american tobacco. i am even starting to look like a packet of peter styversant!

come on guys,spit it out,did you guys go through similar incidents or am i long overdue for a visa to weskopies assylmn?

wonder if 'friutcake' is on the sol/ensol/modl list?

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hi all

i was curious.did everyone have stress when they considerd to make that move.i mean in the last 3 weeks i have only been researching.

the wife and i have been discussing about our options and tonight i really saw how she is feeling.ag shame, i feel so bad.

as for myself,i feel like i am in a spin dryer on 'extra heavy load 'settings and someone forgot to switch the machine off!!

i cannot sleep and when i do,it would be for a few hours. 3 at the most.

as for cigarettes,jeez,you would be tempted to say i am the owner of british american tobacco. i am even starting to look like a packet of peter styversant!

come on guys,spit it out,did you guys go through similar incidents or am i long overdue for a visa to weskopies assylmn?

wonder if 'friutcake' is on the sol/ensol/modl list?

Ag shame man!!! You guys sounds as if you both need a holiday!!! Yes, the process is stressful, but not more so than living with the crime in South Africa. At least there is a positive side to your current stress, hey? A bright new future in the lucky country.

Take it easy...

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Good luck with the stress. It will get better. The minute you get on the plane, it is as if a great weight falls off your shoulders.

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Ha,Ha!!!

The stress you talk about is so, so normal. You are about to change the whole course of your life!!!

It does get better! I promised myself that when I arrive in Oz I will cut down on a lot of things........yeah right! Smoking more than ever now!!!!

Good luck with all your future plans!!

EricaC :hug:

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It comes and goes...initially when we were researching it was a bit stressful, then we relaxed 'cause we made the decision, then stressed during ACS, then rejoyed when it came back positive, now we're stressing 'cause we've lodged our visa, but will rejoyce once we've received our CO, and do doubt stress for the medicals, but rejoyce when we receive our visa. It's very much a roller coaster ride! :ilikeit:

The important thing is to remember, you're not alone and if things get a bit overwhelming, there's always someone on the forum who is willing to listen and support you. Also, it's important to support one another. Just think of the end result, it makes all of this worth it.

All the best!

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i was curious.did everyone have stress when they considerd to make that move.i mean in the last 3 weeks i have only been researching the wife and i have been discussing about our options and tonight i really saw how she is feeling.ag shame, i feel so bad.

Its normal - our migration process has TAKEN OVER!!

It's all we talk about, its all I surf the net for anymore and any OZ books etc are being tracked down and bought.

Gone are the days of reading a "chic" book to relax for me, its all OZ travel guides, stories and magazines.

I our house, as far as our migration goes, i wear the pants :whome:

When it came to deciding on the territory we wanted to settle in - my husbands words to me were...

"You decide, i will go where ever you tell me to, as long as we get there"

I could not believe it, I mean this is a life changing experience and personally i think it should be family decision but hey to be honest I think I have "drowned" him in information, news, changes and generally anything I think is worth getting excited about that he has gone mad.

We are all 120% on board for this process but it does become a life goal. Stress unfortunately comes with the territory so do the ups and downs. Eg: I sold some of my goodies and burst into tears as soon as the lady drove away, and that was the first thing to go!!!

Can't imagine how i am going to be when D-Day arrives.

All i can say is: both of you, take it all in your stride, go with the flow and TRY to enjoy the process. There is always a lighter side to everything. As for the tumble drier, enjoy the ride its not all bad.

PS: Give your wife a huge hug

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Hi

I felt the same as you guys, but i did almost everything, on the entire process and it was not even for my career but for my wonderfull tradie Oh, first off i am kind off emotional with a small hart and big determination, i know what i say know is kinda cruel but, do not think of your friends & fam in the beginning first get all your ducks in a row, get each one in the fam comfy with the idea, get a plan!!! see your future and take each step to get to your goal. if you have told all the fam & friends alraedy be beware the will in the future be like over your bumm with questions all the time. for me personally i cant even remeber how many times i cried, felt hopeless & hubby did not really know what to do. he just kept on supporting the dream, and we have only been here for a month we know its worth it

strongs to both of you it is a very very hard process!!!

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After loosing a loved one, moving countries permanently apparently is the most stressful event in life!

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Hi Abdul

MMMM The sudden impact of your decisions are slowly starting to become reality. Been there - still there. It was this time last year that I became a fruitcase. :whome: I was so pumpt up, It felt like I was going to get on that plane the next day. Well a few things I would have done differently. Kept my big mouth shut at work, I didn't mind telling friends and family - I feel that they should know. Try and stay objective - certain decisions need to be made here - now.

Strongs and welcome

Karina

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You joking about fruitcakes hey!!...ive been finishing almost every sentence with "when we in oz" or..."for when we arrive in oz"...

Even groceries hey!...i buy an extra soap or shampoo or cleaning products "for in the container" :P ..and this has been going since feb 2008 :blink:

Now im buying time left right and centre...i think the britannia guy thinks im a nutter....oooh yaaaay ...an extra week...more time to "plan" the move...

Its all about oz hey...no matter which way u turn... :huh:

I find rescue remedy and a glass of red every night helps!...also...try stop smoking...i did and i can tell you smoking only increases the stress...its one extra thing to worry about!

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Guest Lara

It is extremely stressful moving country. You leave behind everyone you know and love and everthing familiar to you. But you will grow by moving and learn new things and meet new people. My dad always says "the world is one country". So you will find people that seem familiar even in a new country.

Good luck and don't beat yourself up about wanting to move. Stop smoking it will only make you feel more stressed. Rather start doing some mediation and get plenty of fresh air and excercise. Add plenty vit D (free from the sunlight).

I have got depression after every time I moved town (not just country). So I know how stressful it can be. The important thing is to recognise the stress and to start dealing with it and to start using some coping mechanisms like relaxation techniques. Also it is important to get out there and meet people even if you don't feel like it. Social networking is extremely imporrtant.

I had terrible insomnia for months leading up to our move to Australia. My brain wouldn't switch off at night.

At times I have been a queen fruitcake but I'm also a human being and I have feelings like everyone else.

Thankfully I have made a wonderful bunch of friends some through this forum and other through my children's school.

I can now say I feel at home in my new country Australia.

hi all

i was curious.did everyone have stress when they considerd to make that move.i mean in the last 3 weeks i have only been researching.

the wife and i have been discussing about our options and tonight i really saw how she is feeling.ag shame, i feel so bad.

as for myself,i feel like i am in a spin dryer on 'extra heavy load 'settings and someone forgot to switch the machine off!!

i cannot sleep and when i do,it would be for a few hours. 3 at the most.

as for cigarettes,jeez,you would be tempted to say i am the owner of british american tobacco. i am even starting to look like a packet of peter styversant!

come on guys,spit it out,did you guys go through similar incidents or am i long overdue for a visa to weskopies assylmn?

wonder if 'friutcake' is on the sol/ensol/modl list?

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to all the "family" who replied this is what happened tonight.

remember she still had that "freddy kruger" look you know.

i took the laptop to the missus and asked her to read.and so i sat next to her ever so still.deeply engrossed in the tv.she read the entire thread and tonight after a long time she actually smiled.

this made me so happy that we ended up laughing.laughing at ourselves.this made us feel better!

i dont know how to say thank you to the forumites.because we always used to laugh.

i guess i was so engrossed with this push/pull thingy that i forgot how to laugh albeit at ourselves.

i once read somwhere that "THE DARKER IT GETS,THE BRIGHTER THE STARS SHINE".

I pray that all laugh a bit.it does wonders for the soul.

guys thanks for the posts it made us realize that we are not on death row!!

yeah i have not forgotten the advise.i am going to at least cut down on the cigarretes.

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to all the "family" who replied this is what happened tonight.

remember she still had that "freddy kruger" look you know.

i took the laptop to the missus and asked her to read.and so i sat next to her ever so still.deeply engrossed in the tv.she read the entire thread and tonight after a long time she actually smiled.

this made me so happy that we ended up laughing.laughing at ourselves.this made us feel better!

i dont know how to say thank you to the forumites.because we always used to laugh.

i guess i was so engrossed with this push/pull thingy that i forgot how to laugh albeit at ourselves.

i once read somwhere that "THE DARKER IT GETS,THE BRIGHTER THE STARS SHINE".

I pray that all laugh a bit.it does wonders for the soul.

guys thanks for the posts it made us realize that we are not on death row!!

yeah i have not forgotten the advise.i am going to at least cut down on the cigarretes.

:blink:

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i took the laptop to the missus and asked her to read.and so i sat next to her ever so still.deeply engrossed in the tv.she read the entire thread and tonight after a long time she actually smiled.

this made me so happy that we ended up laughing.laughing at ourselves.this made us feel better!

i dont know how to say thank you to the forumites.because we always used to laugh.

i guess i was so engrossed with this push/pull thingy that i forgot how to laugh albeit at ourselves.

i once read somwhere that "THE DARKER IT GETS,THE BRIGHTER THE STARS SHINE".

I pray that all laugh a bit.it does wonders for the soul.

guys thanks for the posts it made us realize that we are not on death row!!

yeah i have not forgotten the advise.i am going to at least cut down on the cigarretes.

So glad for you guys, as they say laughter is the best medicine. :lol::lol:

And maybe you should try stop smoking altogether, apparently expensive here in Aus!

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If you think the stress is bad now, wait till you have the VISA and you are trying to sell your house etc. :lol:

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If you think the stress is bad now, wait till you have the VISA and you are trying to sell your house etc. :lol:

Sshhhh! Don't scare the living daylights out of them...

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to all the "family" who replied this is what happened tonight.

remember she still had that "freddy kruger" look you know.

i took the laptop to the missus and asked her to read.and so i sat next to her ever so still.deeply engrossed in the tv.she read the entire thread and tonight after a long time she actually smiled.

this made me so happy that we ended up laughing.laughing at ourselves.this made us feel better!

i dont know how to say thank you to the forumites.because we always used to laugh.

i guess i was so engrossed with this push/pull thingy that i forgot how to laugh albeit at ourselves.

i once read somwhere that "THE DARKER IT GETS,THE BRIGHTER THE STARS SHINE".

I pray that all laugh a bit.it does wonders for the soul.

guys thanks for the posts it made us realize that we are not on death row!!

yeah i have not forgotten the advise.i am going to at least cut down on the cigarretes.

Hey Abdul

Its the most stressful experience of your whole life!!I kid you not.Dont be fooled by all this airy fairie mumbo jumbo on the site.its the hardest ,toughest road .So be prepared .rather come prepared for a tough,****, time-because it will be.But it gets easier after awhile.

you have to restart your whole life and get new friends;new contacts etc

also it is very lonely and you will have to adapt.

But we gotta do what we gotta do!!

Cheers and have a great trip

sugan

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Glad you guys are laughing, it's always the best remedy for stress!

All the best to you guys and remeber, your 'forum family' is always here to support you.

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I don't think anyone ever believes me when I tell them I never wanted to move.

Bern literally used to come home with printed out pages from 'some forum' called SAAustralia, and I used to roll my eyes...

He was so committed to the move, and I was just 'blah'... It was a stressful time because he was SO keen, and I was just SO 'blah' about it all.

Then a couple of things happened AND Bernard got blocked from accessing the forum at work. So it became my 'job' to gain information and bring it back home... and then, the more I heard and the more I became involved... the more I just wanted to get on a plane and go...

And as everyone says, it became all too consuming... and it does get stressful...

The worst bit was always the ... WILL WE GET IT or WON'T we?!

And everything revolves around 'when we are in Australia'... 'when we leave'... 'when we do this'... 'when we do that'...

I guess I just wanted to say Abdul, it does get better. Just make sure you always are open and honest with each other... and make sure you each have a role in getting you over here... Don't leave it up to one person... Share the experience and treat it like an adventure!!!

All the best...

red

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hey hey without my smokes i would never have gotten through the process, but if i had on wish i would of stoped smoking in SA as its damm exoensive for a packet of 20's -A$10 upwards - depens also brands... smile and wave its all you can do?

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I don't think anyone ever believes me when I tell them I never wanted to move.

Bern literally used to come home with printed out pages from 'some forum' called SAAustralia, and I used to roll my eyes...

He was so committed to the move, and I was just 'blah'... It was a stressful time because he was SO keen, and I was just SO 'blah' about it all.

Then a couple of things happened AND Bernard got blocked from accessing the forum at work. So it became my 'job' to gain information and bring it back home... and then, the more I heard and the more I became involved... the more I just wanted to get on a plane and go...

And as everyone says, it became all too consuming... and it does get stressful...

The worst bit was always the ... WILL WE GET IT or WON'T we?!

And everything revolves around 'when we are in Australia'... 'when we leave'... 'when we do this'... 'when we do that'...

I guess I just wanted to say Abdul, it does get better. Just make sure you always are open and honest with each other... and make sure you each have a role in getting you over here... Don't leave it up to one person... Share the experience and treat it like an adventure!!!

All the best...

red

LOL! Now that was a smart move on your husband's part Red! How sure are you that his access was REALLY blocked..? *wink* LOL! I think it was a brilliant ploy to get you hooked, and it worked! :hug:

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Sshhhh! Don't scare the living daylights out of them...

yes tell them eva. :D:ilikeit:

now how am i supposed to show the missus what you guys wrote? :angry: :angry:i know,i know you want me to sleep on the sofa tonight?

:lol::lol: just kidding.

thanks guys it means so much when somebody just shows they give a **** :D:ilikeit::ilikeit:

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yes tell them eva. :rolleyes:;)

now how am i supposed to show the missus what you guys wrote? :angry: :angry:i know,i know you want me to sleep on the sofa tonight?

:lol::lol: just kidding.

thanks guys it means so much when somebody just shows they give a **** :lol::ilikeit::ilikeit:

Abdul, for me it was more like a rollercoaster ride that lasted a year. Up to the point of lets apply there was nothing. Then the exitement of finding out what the ride will be like, talking to people who have done it are going to do, and those in the ride.

The skills assesment and getting all the paperwork, then waiting and waiting and waiting for my diploma and my wifes nursing papers to send to Australia for assesment :mellow: . This was like the long grind up the first hill. So slow, the worry and fear rizing, then that quiet bit at the top, when you have all the papers to send, and everything stops and goes silent while you wait. Then the thrilling rush downwards with all the screaming when you get the positive for migration, only to then go through it all again for the application :lol::lol: . Collecting and ensuring and the slow down as you prepare to submit and find the money to do it. The long wait until a case officer contacts you and says , go for medicals and police checks, you are through the first hoop :holy: . Then the sudden rush like the next downhill as you realise this is it, the last step. After the rushing around and the next wait then the visa arrives :king: and there is the next downhill, the steepest with a loop and spirals in it as you realise you have to tell friends, work and family. The ups and downs of selling, having the last fight with the mother in law about DO YOU REALLY HAVE TO DO THIS TERRIBLE THING TO ME. The comments about how you are mad, others wishing they were you.

The you finally board the plane but when you get here it starts again, the whole ride, but a differnt one, finding a house, job getting the children into school driving licence car buying a house.

Life is an adventure the worse the bad is, the better you appreciate the good. :ilikeit::ilikeit:

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