Selling almost everything - Sydney Hills District

[carl_sydney]

I might be interested as well. Please add price tag's on the items.

I will try and add some prices tomorrow. I've had some Internet problems and only just managed to solve it at this late hour.

I have to apologise about the price for the 6 month old blue couch at the beginning of this topic. It is $800 and not $650. I tried to edit it but

I couldn't find an edit button. Sorry but it was just an honest mistake.

Carl

[Narms]

Hi Carl

Best of luck moving back to SA.

I feel for you guys.

Thanks for your feedback

[carl_sydney]

I might be interested as well. Please add price tag's on the items.

Done

[KarinaPer]

Hi Carl

Sorry to hear about your situation. Thank you very much for sharing it with us. The reasons that you have given for going back are very real, and although we want to put everything in right and wrong boxes, we know life is not that simple.

All the best,

Karina

[kellyporsha]

We are moving back to SA in the next 2-3 months and are selling just about everthing.

We live in Carlingford which is at the southern part of the Hills district close to North Rocks and Beecroft.

Just to give you an idea of what we are selling (All negotiable):

1 Year old Queen size bed incl mattress $650

6 Month old Queen size bed $350

6 Month old Lounge Suite $650

6 month old dining table & 4 chairs $250

and lots of other items

Hi Carl,

I deeply wish you and your family all the best and hope everything will turn out well for all of you. It though must be exciting to go back home and believe you cannot wait any longer for the day to arrive to be with your family.

I am in search of a car and was wondering what you are doing with yours. Can you pls. pm me your contact details. Thanks

kelly

[Riekie]

It was a brave move to come here for the sake of your family and it is a brave move to go back for the sake of your family, sounds like you love them very much.

I agree with Andrea 100%

I know it would sound like I'm trying to put doubt in your mind, but before you go back, maybe take the family there for a visit. There's a reason why I'm saying this, from my own experience, so hear me out.

When we moved to Australia in 2004, my son (then 18) was so miserable, he bordered on depression. We bought him a ticket to visit his friends in South Africa 6 months after we came over, and this is what he experienced:

His friends have moved on and although he was "the long lost hero" when they first saw him again, after a few days they were carrying on with their lives and new friendships and he felt like a 5th wheel most of the time. His welcome was not so warm from everyone either - some of his friends "blamed" him for leaving South Africa and felt that he has no right to return and simply claim his spot back in the group.

His friends were still all out of work, either sitting around at home or doing odd jobs here and there. None of them had any vision or set plans for their future, which made him realise that he'd be better off in Australia in that regard.

In the 6 months since leaving South Africa, he became used to life in Australia (even though he did not feel that way while he was here) and being back in South Africa was a shock for him. He could not believe that things have gone so bad (maybe it hasn't but compared to Australia, it must have seemed that way to him). He accompanied a friend to a suburb in Pretoria West to collect something and he said he was scared all the time, just wanting to get out of there.

Kids are very adjustable but they're also very fragile, especially at the age your kids are. All they remember of South Africa are their friends and the good times they had an all they know of Australia is how miserable they are without their South African friends. If they see life in South Africa before making up their minds as to where they want to be, they might be more able to make an informed decision instead of an emotional decision.

My son went back for another visit 18 months after his first and he came back stating : "I'm never going back again" After initially not wanting to come here in the first place, then being miserable & depressed all the time, he is now so happy here, because he saw for himself where his future was. When we came out to Australia, we told him that he did not have to stay here if, after a year, he still felt that he wanted to go back to South Africa. After a year, he still had his doubts and we suggested he stay until we all have PR, then he'll always be able to come back, which he did. His last visit to South Africa was the light-bulb moment he needed...

This may not work for you and your family - I'm only sharing from our experience. I wish you all the best for the future and hope that your kids will find happiness, either here in Australia or back in South Africa. Immigration is a very traumatic experience, even for those of us who do find happiness here. You gotta do what's right for you and for your family. Good luck!!

[Riekie]

I put the some photos of the items for sale on flickr.

I will add more photos and information as I find the time:

Furniture & Household Goods for Sale

Also try Ebay. We've sold most of our extra stuff on Ebay for even more than what we've paid for it in South Africa! Start at a low price, otherwise ppl don't bid. We've sold stuff for $400 which I started @ $48. Most ppl want a bargain, so they'll search for items under $50 etc. Once they like something, they're willing to pay more to get it, and if they'll keep on bidding to win! (Watch a few items for sale similar to what you're selling to see what they're selling for - that will give you an idea of what to expect). It's always a gamble, 'cause you might only get $48 for something worth much more... At least you'll get your stuff all sold.

Good luck with the selling!

[lyall]

my heart goes out to your family, we have friends from south africa living in the same town as us, with a son 18 and daughter 20, and the children are really unhappy here, i think they will also be going back within the next few months, they are moving to another town/state this month, and are hoping this might help the family, if that doesnt work they will also be going back. the father is on 457, has had to get a new sponsor for a new job.

only you and your wife know the full ins and outs, and you need to do what keeps your children happy, that is what parents who love their kids do isnt it....so, good luck go with you

[Willem Pretorius]

Our kids were already 14 & 17 when we arrived here in June 2007. They just did not adjust well to say the least. They were miserable and we in turn became miserable. We moved to Australia for their sake and saw no point in forcing them to stay here.

Hi Carl,

I wondered for a while if i should reply or not, we are all different and adjust in our own ways to the challenges, changes and can't really compare.

But we have the same experiences with our kids and my comments are in support of your kids, understanding what they went through and their heartaches.

Make no mistake, we had a ball during the last year here in Oz (just as we did when living in SA), done many things but just to be able to experience the total freedom in such safety, with no worries is undescribable. We live in Melbourne, use the excellent public transport and even with that drove a bit over 18 000km through Victoria during the last 10 months, just to give you an idea.

But the high schools is another thing. My daughters was also 14 and 17 when we arrived last year.

And they also have not experienced 1 good school day in Australia.

Schools, Teachers and subject choice are excellent but the culture, lack of respect and discipline amongs kids is another story.

It kills me to see my kids so unhappy because they were always cheerful, positive kids and we really have a tough time keeping them positive and interested in school.

My 15 year old, academic, top 15 in her year group(roughly 310 kids) in SA, every year for many years,heaps of certificates and all the rest, recieved her report when school closed in December and until today have still not looked at it.

She did very well for a dutchman or is that dutchwoman in an english school, recieved an excellent report but even that means nothing to her.

Our 17 year old had it just as tough but have now just cut off. Goes to school and live in her own dreamworld just to survive.

Her subjects, Psychology and Studio Art keeps her going and she excells in that.

We were told that our kids are too "conservative".

But many kids here are on anti-depressants (my 2 not), the top, posh private school in Melbourne had their "40 days" last year and the kids jumped on car roofs,kicked windows out , there is a huge problem with binge drinking etc. so where do one draw the line.

School starts tomorrow and we have to split our kids up because we can't find place for both in other schools.Zoning is an issue.

Going to different schools are going to make matters worse for my kids and it's going to be another tough year.

If it was up to me we would have been back in SA in December, even had a choice between 3 job offers.

But the oldest is in her final VCE year, if we go back now she would have to do grade 11 over as the schooling systems and subjects are just to far apart.

So we will stay another year and just hope for the best.

The current global financial crisis is busy changing the whole picture as well and one will have to try and look in the future to make the best desicion for you family.

After all is said and done, we have a good idea of what you guys are going through and it is not nice to say the least.

I wish you and your family all the best with your return to SA.

Willie

[zorba]

Once again Riekie puts everything into perspective!

I can understand parents wanting to do what's best for their children, that's what we ALL want after all.

...but teens can be moody and difficult at times, sulking and making everyone else miserable when things don't go their way. Being self centred (for a short span) is part of the learning curve and a step in the road to maturity. But sometimes they need to be told to get over themselves and get on with it.

Maybe try to shake things up a little to get them out of the funk they're in. Move house to a different area, change schools, a fresh start is maybe all they need to adjust their mindset? School is supposed to be fun! A place to meet people and form wonderful friendships.

I have seen loads of Saffer teens who are SO VERY HAPPY here in Australia. They too have left friends, family and first-loves behind.

The only unhappy teen I have encountered so far has a very unhappy Mom, she can't seem to settle and it rubs off on her son, everything is seen through fogged lenses, a haze of negativity.

But I suppose each and every family has a different set of personal circumstances and very different dynamics, and what works for the one doesn't necessarily work for the other.

Willie and Carl, I truly hope you find the happiness you are searching for, here or back in SA ...

Hugs to all the Teens!!

[Superkruz]

Reading this thread makes me worried as my son is coming over next week Tuesday to attend uni (UQ) here in Brisbane. He is almost 19. I wonder what student life is like here for a child from SA.... I'm hoping its better than the schools!!

[carl_sydney]

Reading this thread makes me worried as my son is coming over next week Tuesday to attend uni (UQ) here in Brisbane. He is almost 19. I wonder what student life is like here for a child from SA.... I'm hoping its better than the schools!!

I am sorry if this thread is getting you worried. If your son is positive about coming to Oz then he should be fine.

I think there is quite a difference between going to some of the schools here and going to university.

Thanks for all the other messages. Different views and experiences, but all they all interesting to read.

I am trying to sell some items on ebay. It is actually more for fun. I haven't really made a huge effort to sell everything.

If we don't get anything sold we'll just send the main items back in a container and have a garage sale for the rest. It seems most moving companies are quite willing to negotiate a good price given the current economic climate.

[MannyT]

Hi Carl,

We live in the Hills District too, in Cherrybrook. I am so sorry that you have not found happiness here!

I assume your kids are at Carlingford High School, or were they at Cumberland High? When we looked at schools we saw both of those and I was very unimpressed by Carlingford (sorry if I offend anyone, just my personal opinion). The school looked neglected and the kids seemed unruly and disresepectful (not standing aside for adults and teachers, graffitti everywhere, FILTHY toilets, etc). So if your kids are there I can fully understand why they didn't settle well.

We too are burdened with the dreaded school fees (also on a 457), so can understand the financial drain. Have you considered moving interstate to avoid paying fees? Speak to your employer about a transfer. If they are not national, look for another job interstate. Or ask them to sponsor you for PR asap. There has to be a way to get around the issues that are causing your family such distress. Money is a bugger, isn't it? Doesn't buy happiness, but sure as hell causes UNhappiness when there's not enough to go around...

Carl, please, please reconsider going back. It's not the same place anymore. I know that you can and WILL be happy here if some of your circumstances could be different.

I have the number of a wonderful recruitment lady (ex-Saffer), will PM you the details. Will also PM you my mobile number, maybe I can meet your wife for coffee and have a chat?

Take care,

zorba

EDIT to say I have sent you a PM.

Hey Zorba you are a star. Reading your post brought tears to my eyes. I think that it is so tragic when people/families have to, or feel obliged to return to the RSA.

Enjoy!

Manny

[HouseInOz]

We are moving back to SA in the next 2-3 months and are selling just about everthing.

We live in Carlingford which is at the southern part of the Hills district close to North Rocks and Beecroft.

Just to give you an idea of what we are selling (All negotiable):

1 Year old Queen size bed incl mattress $650

6 Month old Queen size bed $350

6 Month old Lounge Suite $650

6 month old dining table & 4 chairs $250

and lots of other items

Carl

I have been an expat in the Far East for over 2 and a half years. We went on pre-expat training. It is said that one should reassess your reasons for going when you feel the urge to go back. Going back also does not prove to be the answer always (if ever). You might never get this chance again? Believe me I know what it is like to live overseas. Here nobody speaks English (locals). Kids attend school with at least 50 other nationalities. No Supermarkets, movies, newspapers, TV etc etc. here readily available in English. Bitterly cold winters (-15 degrees) and very hot summers (40 plus degrees). The list goes on and on. But what is important, such as your safety we have here. I will think of you and trust you to reconsider. Hang in there!

[carl_sydney]

So in the end we have decided to send everything back to SA in a container. Our cars have also already been sorted out.

The actual reason I am posting again today is that I need a home for our other youngster, Bruni. He is just a little brakkie but is definitely my favourite dog ever.

I made a video of him playing with his basket ball in our garden. He is quite a little talent:

Bruni playing with his basket ball

I have deleted the furniture photos on my Flickr web site and have uploaded photos of Bruni

Bruni Photos

Hopefully someone can help him with a new home.

[Karen-in-Brisbane]

He is so cute!! Take him with you. There is no quarantine this side.......

K

[zorba]

Carl, he is VERY cute! I agree, take him with you...

[penny]

Hi Carl and Willie

Carl your dog is amazing. Unfortunately we live in rented accomodation and are unable to have a dog.

Thank you to both of you for your experiences. We have a similar problem with our 18 year old daughter. She stayed in SA to finish Matric and arrived here on 7th Jan 2009. From day one we have had a miserable child. She is missing her freinds so much. Fortunately (but very sad for her) her boyfreind has stopped communicating with her. This is after telling me that he will love her forever and can't live with out her. She is now doing orientation at Monash but as an International student she is not meeting any locals. Most of the students are Asian and she says she has nothing in common with them and they speak a different language. We are very worried about her. We have said that if she is still unhappy after this year we will re-assess it. Hopefully she will settle down. Before we moved here her plan was to go to the UK for a gap year. We have pointed out that she would have missed her freinds had that scenario worked out.

One little spark was yesterday. She is employed to do after care activities and the school she visited on a Tuesday have taken a real shine to her. She told them yesterday that she would be unable to carry on because of her Uni timetable. There was a huge outcry and they have told her that they will adjust their activities just to have her back. This is a feather in her cap.

Our son of 15 has settled so well at school. He does not want to go back. For my husband and I we have to make this work as going back is not an option. It would break us if she decides that her heart is definitely in SA. Hopefully our PR will come through soon so that she could then move around more easily.

Money is a huge thing with this as well. I have still not managed to find work and so we have to try and live off one salary. I don't believe that money buys happiness but it sure helps if one can spoil ourselves when we are feeling down.

Willie, may I PM you. Maybe our kids can meet up.

Penny

[polly]

He is adorable! Hope you find him a good home soon. Unfortunately we are in Melbourne, so we cannot take him

[joweni]

Hi Penny,

We arrived in Australia with a very unhappy teenager-she cried all the way from Jo'burg airport to Perth-what a flight!! She also left behind a boyfriend and then we had 7 months before she started uni. It was a really tough time-we were living in a small rural town,only one salary and feeling very isolated!! But in the past 3 years things slowly turned around. My daughter went off to uni and although she didn't make good friends straight away she started working in child care and also had a coffee shop job.Now 3 years later she has the life we had hoped to be able to offer her here in Aussie-she has been overseas on holiday using her own earnings, has met a wonderful Aussie fella,made lovely friends and is in her last last year of uni. She loves buzzing around town in her little car playing hockey,going to the beaches,eating out and at least once a month gives her Dad and I a big hug with a thank you for bringing me to Australia. All you can do is talk,encourage and be there for her while she is making the transition.Good luck and I hope that things turn out as well for your family as they have for ours.

Wendy

[Elana Coetzer]

Hi Carl,

Tell us more about Bruni. Male? Is he house trained? Does he tolerate children? Does he sleep inside or outside?

Elana

Edited February 25, 2009 by Elana Coetzer

[carl_sydney]

Hi Carl,

Tell us more about Bruni. Male? Is he house trained? Does he tolerate children? Does he sleep inside or outside?

Elana

Hi Elana

He is pretty well house trained. Not perfect but good. He needs a fewing good chewing toys otherwise you might find him proudly running past you with your favourite pair of shoes. He stays outside but gets to hang around the house for an hour or two every day. He absolutely loves kids and is very happy go lucky around them. If he gets irritable or restless I spend a few minutes with him playing catch with his tennis ball. He fetches like crazy and then calms down completely and afterwards seems to be in complete dog heaven.

Carl

[Ozzie Girl Now]

Just add to what I said before, some of the mistakes we made were:

Arriving here with very little money. It gave us very little flexibility in changing our circumstances and dictating our movements.

Being on a 457 Visa we were limited to sending our children to two schools and were liable for International Student Fees (You only pay these fees in certain cities /states especially where there is great influx of immigrants). The fee is about $5000 per child per year. We initially got exemption but eventually had to start paying. The school itself is OK as far as teachers and curricullum go but they have a lot of troubled kids who are undisciplined and unruly.

Without giving long explanations I would say that you can save yourself a lot of unnecessary complications if you arrive here with a PR Visa and a reasonable amount of money. That is if you are moving with family and your plan is to stay here permanently.

That is just our experience. Most people do eventually settle in quite well here. I would have been very happy to stay here if things had worked out a bit better for us. Personally I would consider returning eventually. My wife would possibly need a few years to recover from our experiences here.

Hello

We came over the same way, with very litte money, my son was 12 we ended up also paying the high fees, but then discovered a private school was half the price so I moved my son and he found a good mate. He is almost 16 now amd is very very happy - he also wanted to go back the 1st 2 years as he was unhappy, but now he loves it.

Can't you start your application for PR? That would help you heaps?????

It will be sad if you have to leave.......

[Ozzie Girl Now]

Just add to what I said before, some of the mistakes we made were:

Arriving here with very little money. It gave us very little flexibility in changing our circumstances and dictating our movements.

Being on a 457 Visa we were limited to sending our children to two schools and were liable for International Student Fees (You only pay these fees in certain cities /states especially where there is great influx of immigrants). The fee is about $5000 per child per year. We initially got exemption but eventually had to start paying. The school itself is OK as far as teachers and curricullum go but they have a lot of troubled kids who are undisciplined and unruly.

Without giving long explanations I would say that you can save yourself a lot of unnecessary complications if you arrive here with a PR Visa and a reasonable amount of money. That is if you are moving with family and your plan is to stay here permanently.

That is just our experience. Most people do eventually settle in quite well here. I would have been very happy to stay here if things had worked out a bit better for us. Personally I would consider returning eventually. My wife would possibly need a few years to recover from our experiences here.

Hello

We came over the same way, with very litte money, my son was 12 we ended up also paying the high fees, but then discovered a private school was half the price so I moved my son and he found a good mate. He is almost 16 now amd is very very happy - he also wanted to go back the 1st 2 years as he was unhappy, but now he loves it.

Can't you start your application for PR? That would help you heaps?????

It will be sad if you have to leave.......

[bluebonnet]

Hello

We came over the same way, with very litte money, my son was 12 we ended up also paying the high fees, but then discovered a private school was half the price so I moved my son and he found a good mate. He is almost 16 now amd is very very happy - he also wanted to go back the 1st 2 years as he was unhappy, but now he loves it.

Can't you start your application for PR? That would help you heaps?????

It will be sad if you have to leave.......

This might be off topic now but anyway. We moved from the US (8 months ago) to Switzerland and I have a 15 year old (16 next month) who just wants to go back. He was born in the US so I understand. We took him away from friends, his school, and everything that was familiar to him. Fortunately he is in an English school now, so he does not have to struggle with the language (german) which helps a lot. But I see that it took your son about 2 years to adjust and now he is happy. So I hope for the best, and that my son will also soon be happier. He has a couple of friends, but not a real good mate yet. Maybe if he has a good friend or later a girlfriend, he will feel happier. It bothers me a lot, we want our children to be happy, don't we?