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Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road???


MarcK
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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD????????

1. JULIUS MALEMA: We don't care whether the chicken crossed the road or did not cross the road. We will crush it. We will kill if comrade chicken cross comrade Zuma's road to the Union Building.

2. THE POPE: God knows.

3. POLICEMAN: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll know why.

4. ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

5. SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

6. MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives being called into question.

7. GEORGE W. BUSH (2): We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side or not. The chicken is either with us or against us. There is no middle ground here.

8. NELSON MANDELA: Never again, will the chicken be questioned for crossing the road. This is an ideal for which I am prepared to die.

9. THABO MBEKI: We need to establish if really there is a connection between the chicken and the road.

10. ROBERT MUGABE: For all these years the road has been owned by the white farmers. The poor underprivileged chicken has waited too long for that road to be given to him and now he is crossing it in force with his fellow war veteran chickens. We intend taking over this road and giving it to the road-less chicken so that they can cross it without fear of retribution from Britain who promised money to institute road freedom. We will not stop until all road-less chickens have roads to cross and the freedom to cross them.

11. JACOB ZUMA: I am gravely suspicious that this question is being asked with a malicious intention to trap me, send the Scorpions to raid my chicken run, haul me before the courts and charge me for sodomizing the chicken that walked across the road towards me as it was running away from an advancing light shower!

12. BILL CLINTON: I did not have any sexual relations with that chicken!

13. Dr IRVIN KHOZA: This chicken was beginning to think like an irresponsible kaffir!

14. STEVE KHOMPELA: We need to understand that it's very difficult and detrimental to ignore the speed at which the chicken was running, or the landscape, there could be other mitigating factors that led to the transgression, for example, the temperature on the day.

15. SIYABONGA NOMVETE: What kitchen?

16. THABO MBEKI (latest version): Well as far as we know the road is still in good condition, everything is okay, the chicken is also doing fine.... so the crossing of the road never happened.... and we are happy with the situation.

17. PATRICE MOTSEPE: How much is the road, plus the chicken?

18. LUCAS MANGOPE: Ke kgogo ya me eo, le tselana eo ke ya me... tsotlhe tseo ke tsa me.... Fa kgogo e tlotse tsela e le nngwe, ga gona mathata, mathata a simolla ga di le tharo gonne fao di ka diga puso yame ka morusu....

19. TITO MBOWENI: We need a tollgate there, and charge these chickens when they cross the road.... by the way, that chicken will cost R5 more from next Wednesday....

20. KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side.

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18. LUCAS MANGOPE: Ke kgogo ya me eo, le tselana eo ke ya me... tsotlhe tseo ke tsa me.... Fa kgogo e tlotse tsela e le nngwe, ga gona mathata, mathata a simolla ga di le tharo gonne fao di ka diga puso yame ka morusu....

Didn’t understand a word, old Lucas always spoke perfect English.

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